A measly five-hour shift shouldn't have to be like this. >.<
Truth in Sweatshirts
Guy drunk at 11 in the morning comes up to me as I'm bringing in carts, mumbles something semi-coherently.
"Ummmggghhhh...bleggghhhhh, uh where's.....never mind, answered my own question."
And then he staggered into the mens bathroom.
He was wearing a sweatshirt with "You look like I need a drink" on it. How apropos. You do look like I need a drink. Also, you sound like it.
You know the world has it in for you when...
You're called to deliver a dining set to somebody....
The dining sets are on a pallet that's blocked by a pallet of defectives, so you have to get a pallet jack to move the defectives before loading up the dining set...
The people who bought the dining set have rolled up their Cadillac Not An Escalade, and want you do try to fit the box in the trunk....
Which, not surprisingly, doesn't work, so they decide they should go home and get their truck
...
So then they come back with their truck....
And decide they don't want the dining set after all
....
So you have to put it back....
Which means moving the pallet of defectives again.
Derp Rockets In Flight, Afternoon's A Fright
(sorry if I stuck that song in your head now. Just one more service I offer.
)
Here's a fun game for you all to play! Count the derps in this phone call I took!
It was a woman wanting instructions for a gazebo she bought "a couple" years ago, from some other store, because she wanted the manufacturer's toll-free number.
When I told her I couldn't give her documentation for an item that A). was most likely discontinued, and B). we didn't carry anyway, she told me I wasn't being helpful and hung up angrily.
Sorry, but while I can do many things, extracting heads from anuses isn't one of them.
You know the world's got it out for you when...
Five minutes before your shift ends, you're called to deliver a recliner to a young couple...
Who roll up in their teeny tiny Saturn
....
The girl complains it isn't assembled and came in a box (because that's how all our furniture comes. Drown in your bleach bottle)....
They make you take the pieces out of the box....
The pieces fit in the car!...
But it took fifteen minutes of shoving and rearranging crap, and thus you punch out five minutes late.
Truth in Sweatshirts
Guy drunk at 11 in the morning comes up to me as I'm bringing in carts, mumbles something semi-coherently.
"Ummmggghhhh...bleggghhhhh, uh where's.....never mind, answered my own question."
And then he staggered into the mens bathroom.
He was wearing a sweatshirt with "You look like I need a drink" on it. How apropos. You do look like I need a drink. Also, you sound like it.
You know the world has it in for you when...
You're called to deliver a dining set to somebody....
The dining sets are on a pallet that's blocked by a pallet of defectives, so you have to get a pallet jack to move the defectives before loading up the dining set...
The people who bought the dining set have rolled up their Cadillac Not An Escalade, and want you do try to fit the box in the trunk....
Which, not surprisingly, doesn't work, so they decide they should go home and get their truck

So then they come back with their truck....
And decide they don't want the dining set after all

So you have to put it back....
Which means moving the pallet of defectives again.
Derp Rockets In Flight, Afternoon's A Fright
(sorry if I stuck that song in your head now. Just one more service I offer.

Here's a fun game for you all to play! Count the derps in this phone call I took!
It was a woman wanting instructions for a gazebo she bought "a couple" years ago, from some other store, because she wanted the manufacturer's toll-free number.
When I told her I couldn't give her documentation for an item that A). was most likely discontinued, and B). we didn't carry anyway, she told me I wasn't being helpful and hung up angrily.
Sorry, but while I can do many things, extracting heads from anuses isn't one of them.
You know the world's got it out for you when...
Five minutes before your shift ends, you're called to deliver a recliner to a young couple...
Who roll up in their teeny tiny Saturn

The girl complains it isn't assembled and came in a box (because that's how all our furniture comes. Drown in your bleach bottle)....
They make you take the pieces out of the box....
The pieces fit in the car!...
But it took fifteen minutes of shoving and rearranging crap, and thus you punch out five minutes late.
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