The Moth Man Prophecies

[Cerys]

*... name please?*

MM: There's a moth on the phone!
Me: Um - okay ... was there a number that you wanted?
MM: I don't like moths!
Me: Maybe if you flapped your hand at it that would make it fly off.
MM: I tried that.
Me: Did you actually want a telephone number?
MM: I need to get rid of the moth! I don't like moths!
Me: Is there another phone you could use?
MM: Oh ... oh, it's okay. The moth's gone.
Me: Well, that's good. Can I -
MM: A dog chased it away.
Me: Can I help you with a num-
MM: I don't like dogs.
Me: Is there a number you'd like?
MM: To get rid of the dog?
Me: No, I mean did you phone us to get a number?
MM: Can you make the dog go away?
Me: Not without powers of telekinesis, I'm sorry, no.
MM: Do you have powers of telekinesis?
Me: No.
MM: Oh.
Me: Is there -
MM: The dog's gone now.
Me: Does that mean -
MM: The tyrannosaurus rex chased it away.
Me: *Facepalm*

[Mikkel]

MM: The tyrannosaurus rex chased it away.
Me: *Facepalm*

Did he like the T-Rex?

[Cerys]

You'll have to wait for the next instalment. Yes - he came back. A lot.

[dalesys]

You'll have to wait for the next instalment. Yes - he came back. A lot.

He's the cat!

[Cerys]

I assumed it was a one-off. Occasionally we'd get bored people just phoning silliness over the course of an evening - if it was quiet, it could be quite fun. The Moth Man wasn't really that kind of caller. I got the impression that he called us while waiting for a late night bus - he was just trying to fill the time. Maybe he had just enough imagination to come up with the whole moth scenario, but didn't quite have enough creativity change the record. So when he came through to me a second time, a week or so later, it wasn't hard to pick up where we left off.

MM: There's a moth on the phone!
Me: Again?
MM: I don't like moths.
Me: What kind is it?
MM: It's on the phone.
Me: Did you want a number?
MM: I don't like moths.
Me: Is there a dog there to chase it away this time?
MM: No.
Me: Pity.
MM: I don't like dogs.
Me: Even when they get rid of moths?
MM: There's a dog outside. It's too big. I don't like dogs.
Me: Is the moth still there?
MM: There's a moth on the phone.
Me: Yes, I know. What's the T rex up to?
MM: T rex?
Me: Isn't there a tyrannosaurus there as well?
MM: *click*

We had variations on this for a couple of months - and then, one night, he went critical. The bus must have been very late. There were about five of us working, and two of them - we'll call them Phil and Ty - were experiencing Moth Man for pretty much the first time. Phil had just come out of service to take his break when -

MM: There's a moth on the phone!
Me: You don't like moths, do you?
MM: I don't like moths!
Me: Just let me connect you to the right department. *Phil plugs in his headset*
P: Hello, caller? You are through to Telecom's Moth Eradication Squad. How may we be of service?
MM: There's a moth on the phone!
P: Yes, I thought I recognised the readings. Stay very still and we'll be with you as soon as possible.
MM: *click*

Some co-workers are so great.

[Jay 2K Winger]

MM: There's a moth on the phone!
Me: You don't like moths, do you?
MM: I don't like moths!
Me: Just let me connect you to the right department. *Phil plugs in his headset*
P: Hello, caller? You are through to Telecom's Moth Eradication Squad. How may we be of service?
MM: There's a moth on the phone!
P: Yes, I thought I recognised the readings. Stay very still and we'll be with you as soon as possible.
MM: *click*

Some co-workers are so great.

That's awesome.

I'd be tempted to add to the "Stay very still" and say "Remember, they can smell fear."

[Cerys]

He might have said that - bear in mind that I'm remembering this from over fifteen years ago. It's the kind of thing he'd come up with.

[MoonCat]

Your co-worker's response was great. I wish I'd thought of that for some of the calls I've had.

[Syriilord]

Did he like the T-Rex?

No, but the T-Rex liked him a lot


He was delicious....

[Cerys]

Presumably not enough. He continued to call us for at least a year. Always the same spiel, with variations. History is silent on what eventually became of the moth.

[Ironclad Alibi]

The OP reminded me of the story of the old woman who swallowed a fly.

[Cerys]

D'you reckon Optimus Prime showed up and scared off the T Rex?

[EricKei]

D'you reckon Optimus Prime showed up and scared off the T Rex?

Nah. He probably rode the T-Rex off into the sunset.

[Marmalady]

History is silent on what eventually became of the moth.

Maybe it met a nice myth and they flew away together to live happily ever after....?

[Blade_Raver]

You know what made them all go away? Sharks with frickin' laser beams!