OMG, This isn't Rocket Science!

[Misty]

Dear Customers,

I work in a yogurt shop. It's a very simple job. My day basically consists of 1) serving yogurt 2) cleaning 3) restocking. It doesn't get much simpler than that.

Oh wait, yes it does. You know what's even simpler? Ordering yogurt. Just tell me the size, flavor, and toppings, and then stand there until I hand you your yogurt. I do all the heavy lifting here, not you, so for the love of God, please stop making things so complicated!

"I'll have a chocolate with strawberries." Okay, WHAT SIZE? It's unbelievable how many of you forget to mention size. Not only do we have several different sizes of cups, which are displayed on the counter in front of you, but we also have cones! That's right, we have cups and cones! Did I just blow your mind or what?

"I'll have a small chocolate with toppings." Okay, WHAT TOPPINGS? As you can clearly see, we have 24 dry toppings and 8 fruit toppings. I assume you don't want them all, so could you be a little more specific? Also, I realize that you're allowed as many toppings as we can fit "comfortably into the cup," but know when to say when! Do I really need to tell you that your full-to-the-point-of-overflowing yogurt can't hold another topping? Besides, with so many conflicting flavors I can't imagine such a monstrosity could possibly taste good; at this point "getting your money's worth" is no different from being a greedy pig, so knock it off.

Finally, my personal favorite...

"I've never been here before. How does this work?" You're kidding. Have you never been to a yogurt shop, or an ice cream shop, or a McDonald's, or any other establishment where you order from a menu like the one on the wall behind me? Come on, as one of the few animals on this Earth that has been blessed with cognitive reasoning skills and opposable thumbs, surely you can figure this out...and while you're doing that, I'll be banging my head against this wall, the one with the large menu on it.

Whew, I feel much better now. Thanks for letting me get this off my chest.

Sincerely,
Your Disgruntled Wage Slave

[Sleepwalker]

I think this every time a cusstomer comes through the drive through and gets tripped up by the choice between coke, diet coke and sprite. DO NOT TELL ME YOU HAVE NEVER HAD THESE BEFORE. YOU ARE LYING. THIS DOES NOT REQUIRE DEEP THOUGHT.

[Racket_Man]

"I'll have a chocolate with strawberries." Okay, WHAT SIZE? It's unbelievable how many of you forget to mention size. Not only do we have several different sizes of cups, which are displayed on the counter in front of you, but we also have cones! That's right, we have cups and cones! Did I just blow your mind or what?

Sincerely,
Your Disgruntled Wage Slave

You would be surprised at how MANY customers calling a pizza place do the same thing. The conversation is as follows:
CSR <openning spiel including asking if this is delivery or carryout/takeaway>
Cust: I wanna pizza with <10 toppings rattled off like an auctionieer>
CSR: Delivery or carryout?
Cust: I wanna pizza with <10 toppings rattled off like an auctionieer>
CSR: Delivery or carryout??
wash rinse and repeat once or twice more

CSR OK delivery then. May I have your phone number PLEASE.
Cust: HOW much is that going to be?????

you get the idea. trying to get them to even listen is a chore. the hunger blinds them (or in this case makes them deaf) to a voice coming over that modern thingy called a TELEPHONE.

[Justicecupcakes]

I know the feeling. When someone orders a meal at my work, you have to enter the drink before you can keep going with the order. But customers rattle off a heap of meals and talk over me when I ask what drink they want... REPEATEDLY.
It goes like this:

Customer: I'll have a chicken meal, a wr-
Me: I'm sorry, which drink sis you want with your chicken mea-
Customer: -ap meal, with no mayo, a burger mea-
Me I'm sorry, I can't enter the other meals untill you tell me which dr-
Customer (slightly louder, to drown me out): -l, extra lettuce and with bacon and a kids meal.
Me: What drink did you want with the chicken meal?
Customer: Uhhh.... Ummmm...
Me: ...
Customer: (after ten minutes) Pepsi
Me: Okay now what other meals did you want?
Customer: *sighs heavily at the extreme inconvenience* a wrap meal, with no mayo, a burger mea-
Me: What drink with the-
Cutomer: -l, extra lettuce and with bacon and a kids meal.

Why do I bother?

[PepperElf]

that's gotta be annoying too though to be stuck in pattern like that. cos i know i don't always think of my drink until last, or stuff like that.

[EricKei]

You would be surprised at how MANY customers calling a pizza place do the same thing.

I wouldn't be...but I've worked at a few.

I would like to take this moment to make a public service announcement. If we pick up the phone and say "Hi, this is [name] at [pizza joint/location], is this for pickup or delivery?" -- NONE of these are proper responses:

- "Yeah, I want a large with everything..."

- "This isn't the cable company?"

- "Yeah yeah I'm paying with credit, the number is..."

- (anything involving foul language and/or yelling)

- "I want a pasta salad"

- "Sherie?"

- "Wait, this isn't <name of store other than one our company owns>?!" (we also won't give you the number to the competition, even if we DO happen to know it)

Note that the next thing we ask for will probably be your phone number. If we do, it means that we NEED your phone number. As in, the system will not allow us to proceed without it. Correct responses to such an inquiry do NOT include:

- Placing your order without stopping for breath

- Loudly demanding to know why the hell we need your number

- Saying that you refuse to give out your number

Thank you very much for your time. We now return you your regularly scheduled forum programming, already in progress.

[blas]

Ugh, sounds like the tards at Subway I always get stuck behind.

"I wanna footlong roast beef!"

"What kind of bread?"

"Roast beef!"

"What kind of bread?"

"Roast beef and cheddar cheese and"

"What kind of bread?!"

Or the people who go to the counter, NOT the "order here" spot, and proceed to rattle off their entire order at once.

[Pixilated]

Everybody has a brain burp once in a while ... and of course when you go into a new restaurant you may find yourself going at the order counter ... but otherwise, jeez, how hard is it to organize your order before you get to the counter ...

Oh, right. Forgot where I was.

[Kiwi]

I still haven't figured out how to get customers to answer to "hi, how are you today?"

I also have to ask if they want to sign up for coupons, it flys right over their heads "whats that?"

You have never heard of a coupon before?

[ShadowTiger]

(I cut keys)

They rest their elbows on the price list, then ask me how much it costs to cut a key.

Then when I'm done, they look at my perfectly flat countertop and ask if they pay here or at the register. My perfectly flat countertop.


Every time.

[Mytical]

Come on you know you got your interdimensional register hidden on that counter top..admit it