Wherein We Face The CHALLENGE

[CrazedClerkthe2nd]

I Don't Know Why I Ask

Me: “Would you like anything else?”
SC: “PANTS!!!”

I'm surprised it wasn't: CAMO PANTS!!!

[NateTheChops]

Smack me if I'm repeating anything here.

It'd be hard to tell if you were repeating something you've posted before or if it's a situation that is simply repetitive by nature of your employment. Still it's good to know you're alive and kicking as it were.

The heat is getting to us on the East Coast as well. My dinky little fan barely takes the edge off when the temp gets up to 95 degrees.

Expanding Our Portfolio

Property management and porn. You have to diversify in this economy.

*A beautiful blond supermodel wearing a half buttoned shirt with the property managment company's logo approaches the caller*

Hi there. I'm Candy and I understand you've locked yourself out again. Let me get the key. *Reaches into her blouse to find the strategically hidden apartment key and also emerges with a riding crop.* Now we need to teach you a lesson about losing your house key, mister.

“And your postal code please, sir?”
“It’s V-STOP IT EDDY!”

Sounds like he's doing some kind of bizarre Timelord mathmatics.

I’ll be riding my way bareback down to the warehouse to personally retrieve the questionable assortment of clothing you requested.

If nothing else that will help beat the heat, I'm sure.

I’m not running Genuine Human here.

On the plus side, if you're a replicant then you've lasted a hell of a lot longer than Rutger Hauer.

[mharbourgirl]

Nice to hear from you, dude. I see the west coasters are handling the July heat wave about as well as they always have. Which is to say, the heat is causing short-circuits in the rain-soaked brains and all is chaos. Or would be, if it wasn't too bloody hot to expend energy. Nova Scotia is about as bad, it was a balmy 28C and HUMID today. Which means it FELT like about 35C. I hate humidity.

Only if you get caught. But then, if you get caught, you may not be in a position to get new pants, other than for your funeral. Meh. Whatever. But either way, remember the Polar Bear Rule: you don't have to be faster than the polar bear. You just have to be faster than the guy behind you.

Jester, if a polar bear catches you, you won't need pants at your funeral. They'll be burying what's left of you in a bucket. Or maybe just kick some dirt over the stain on the ground that is about all a polar bear leaves behind.

I think I am going to add Nunavut to my visitation bucket list.

It can't be as horrific as it sounds

It's not. Most of the people that live there are pretty cool. They're not the ones that torture poor GK. And the place is extraordinarily beautiful, and one of the few places on earth where there's still truly wild land. I recommend it.

[Jester]

Jester, if a polar bear catches you, you won't need pants at your funeral. They'll be burying what's left of you in a bucket.

Yet another brilliant reason to add to my long, long, looooooooooooong list of reasons why I really don't need to go anywhere North and Cold.

[Ironclad Alibi]

Am I the only one picturing Foghorn Leghorn here?

Of course not.

[Naaman]

Upon which Yelling Bull berated him for not having “$2.50 for this transformational life experience”.

In the end I never did learn what the Challenge was. Only that it was “grueling”, “intense”, “inexpensive” and “life changing”.

For that sort of money it sounds like industrial laxative

[AmbrosiaWriter]

Any one else think of the "Cinnamon Challenge" with how the guy was describing it? It's a popular thing going around (though it might be at the tail end of it's viral-ness.) I'd love to see Mr. Yelling Bull try to take a tablespoon of cinnamon.

Either that or this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S5pJ1tAWQ8s

[thatcrazyredhead]

Checking in. Not dead.

Hooray!!

I Don't Know Why I Ask

Me: “Would you like anything else?”
SC: “PANTS!!!”

You should really just start asking, "Would you like pants with that?" the way they ask if you want fries at a fast food joint.

Wildlife

Me: “Are you calling to place an order?”
SC: “…..Nuuuuuhhhhh………………..I want order a fox with stripes.”

……..We must have really expanded its our merchandise in the latest catalog. Would you like any other specifically painted wildlife or is your heart set on us pin striping that particular canid? I’m sure if you’re willing to cover the shipping we could spray paint you an elk or something. Maybe a nice burgundy……or perhaps more of a vanilla cream? To match the drapes.

This would be awesome. Especially if you could video their reaction when they open the box. Come to think of it, can I get a dozen assorted polka-dotted weasels delivered to my office? Please instruct the courier to make sure to shake the box a lot.

You’ll pardon me sir, but I did ask “Are you calling to place an order?” not “Can you explain how Canada Post magically finds me and gives me hats?”. I appreciate that you have many questions about this magical world known as “Civilization” but I am not the one to teach you its mysterious ways. Mainly because I have a QA target of 5 minutes for this call and getting you up to speed would likely take several days and possibly colourful diagrams or even a sock puppet.

Flannel graph!!

Your brain seems to have tennis elbow.

I'm going to have to remember that one. It will probably come in handy on more than one occasion where I work.