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Darwin, Please pick up lines 1 and 2, Darwin, Lines 1 and 2 please

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  • Darwin, Please pick up lines 1 and 2, Darwin, Lines 1 and 2 please

    So, there's a new apartment complex going up in town, and they've apparently encountered something in the initial digging that's going to require the application of high-explosives to get out of the way.

    To keep this process from endangering anyone at the already-existing apartments next to the construction site, part of that complex's parking lot that sits a little too close to the blasting area has been roped off.

    Yeah, you can probably guess where this is going.

    Yesterday, I got called over to said complex by the foreman of the blasting crew, because someone parked their car too close to the blasting area and had to be towed to a safer distance...

    Then today, another driver got called over to the same complex. After the last person I towed, they put up extra signage to warn of the danger. 2 evenly-spaced orange/white signs were put up in the closed part of the parking lot that say "BLASTING AREA, KEEP OUT"

    Sure enough, some dummy had parked.....

    RIGHT BETWEEN THE TWO SIGNS

    Maybe he didn't particularly like his car anymore? Too bad they had us tow it out of danger's way before we could find out

    And considering this was a student housing complex, you people got INTO COLLEGE???? Just how far HAVE those SAT scores dropped since I took the test?!
    - They say nothing good happens at 2AM, they're right, I happen at 2AM.

  • #2
    Unfortunately, those SAT tests don't test for common sense...
    When you start at zero, everything's progress.

    Comment


    • #3
      Pretty low . . . pret-ty low . . .

      Quoth MoonCat View Post
      Unfortunately, those SAT tests don't test for common sense...
      But they do test literacy and comprehension.
      Last edited by Dave1982; 10-13-2012, 02:34 AM.
      They say that God only gives us what we can handle. Apparently, God thinks I'm a bad ass.

      Comment


      • #4
        The sad thing is how much teaching has shifted to simply teaching to the test while accumulating mountains of data that nobody knows what to do with...

        Now, if you worded the sign like this...

        Blasting Area. Your car could be...

        A. filled with candy when you come back
        B. be blown up
        C. inspected by a police drug-sniffing dog

        If B doesn't get 'em, then C sure as hell will.

        Comment


        • #5
          Could be a scam, where they came the car damage was worth more than it really was?

          Comment


          • #6
            If they don't have it this way already, maybe suggest that the construction guys add "NOT LIABLE FOR DAMAGE TO VEHICLES OR PROPERTY IN THIS AREA" signs to their existing ones (or legalese to that effect)...
            "For a musician, the SNES sound engine is like using Crayola Crayons. Nobuo Uematsu used Crayola Crayons to paint the Sistine Chapel." - Jeremy Jahns (re: "Dancing Mad")
            "The difference between an amateur and a master is that the master has failed way more times." - JoCat
            "Thinking is difficult, therefore let the herd pronounce judgment!" ~ Carl Jung
            "There's burning bridges, and then there's the lake just to fill it with gasoline." - Wiccy, reddit
            "Retail is a cruel master, and could very well be the most educational time of many people's lives, in its own twisted way." - me
            "Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down...tell you she's hurtin' 'fore she keens...makes her a home." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds, "Serenity" (2005)
            Acts of Gord – Read it, Learn it, Love it!
            "Our psychic powers only work if the customer has a mind to read." - me

            Comment


            • #7
              It's better to tow em'

              Cuz' then they OWE us, not vicey-versey
              - They say nothing good happens at 2AM, they're right, I happen at 2AM.

              Comment


              • #8
                The OP reminded me of this:

                "I don't have to be petty. The Universe does that for me."

                Comment


                • #9
                  Quoth Ironclad Alibi View Post
                  The OP reminded me of this:

                  One of my favorites!

                  And it would've served the idiots right to get their cars blown to bits, but Arga's right, it's better to profit from someone's stupidity.
                  I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.
                  My LiveJournal
                  A page we can all agree with!

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Party Cannon?
                    "First time I ever seen a chainsaw go down anybody's britches,"

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Brings to mind an old bromide: "Most personal problems can be solved by the proper application of high explosives."

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Quoth Taurus52 View Post
                        Brings to mind an old bromide: "Most personal problems can be solved by the proper application of high explosives."
                        Or, as Nabeshin once put it: "Explosions can fix EVERYTHING!"*


                        * - Aka the Michael Bay Solution.
                        PWNADE(TM) - Serve up a glass today! | PWNZER - An act of pwnage so awesome, it's like the victim got hit by a tank.

                        There are only Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse because I choose to walk!

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Quoth Jay 2K Winger View Post
                          Or, as Nabeshin once put it: "Explosions can fix EVERYTHING!"*
                          Up to and including constipation. Just ask Brenda.
                          Human Resources - the adult version of "I'm telling Mom." - Agent Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo (NCIS)

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Quoth DGoddessChardonnay View Post
                            Up to and including constipation. Just ask Brenda.
                            Or me

                            They say that God only gives us what we can handle. Apparently, God thinks I'm a bad ass.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Quoth Panacea View Post
                              Or me

                              Don't tell me you've actually had someone come into the ED with a firecracker up their . . .

                              Do we get the details on this one?
                              Human Resources - the adult version of "I'm telling Mom." - Agent Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo (NCIS)

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