"Broken" means that it's, um, broken.

[Lace Neil Singer]

We had a problem with two of the pumps, which were not dispensing fuel at all, so we put up a sign saying that these particular pumps were broken, locked them and coned them off. Did that stop the customers trying to use them? Did it hell.

I had to go out countless times to put the cones back in their places after customers moved them and attempted to use the pumps, as well as to replace the sign in its proper place after SCs figured that if the sign wasn't there, then the pumps would magically be alright to use. But by far the worst example of SCness came from this man who was seemingly determined to use one of those pumps, come hell or high water.

At the time, I'd gone outside to fill up the paper towels when the SC yelled imperiously over to me in the "Me master, you slave" tone of voice. I went over, and the following conversation took place.

SC: Why are these pumps locked? This is disgraceful that you forgot to unlock these pumps.
Me: Those pumps are not dispensing, so they're locked.
SC: Where's the sign, then?
Me: *points to sign that is in clear sight*
SC: It's not very clear, is it? What do you mean by "broken"?
Me: It means that the pumps are broken.
SC: So why don't you fix them?
Me: I can't fix them, but they have been logged and someone will come and mend them soon.
SC: Well, that's just not good enough. Especially seeing as it's so busy.
Me: (thinks, "You're telling me!") Sorry, but we don't have any control over when they come and fix the pumps. All we can do is log it.
SC: *heavy sigh* I suppose I'll have to go and use another pump, then.

As soon as SC had moved his car away from the broken pump, I replaced the cones that he had taken away as tho they were merely there for decoration, rather than to show people that the pumps were out of use. What more can I do?! There's a sign, the pumps are coned off and locked. Surely that should be enough to show most sane people that the pumps are broken?

[Simbacat]

The stupidity of some people is baffling to me. I seriously wonder how some of these people leave their house in the morning and somehow end up back at their house in the evening.

Stupid should hurt.

[dalesys]

Now if we could just put a Greebo under each cone for when they lifted it...

[emax4]

Replace the cones with rabid pitbulls, and see if customers attempt to use the pumps then. The dogs can even wear a sign around their neck; "PUMP IS BROKEN".

"HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO SEE THAT DOG?!?!!? CALL AN AMBULANCE.."

"...an ambulance won't fix your stupidit-"

"CALL THEM!!"

[aurelemsrealm]

I feel your pain, Lace. I can easily see far too many of the inbreeders who frequent my store doing something like that. I've almost gotten to the point that I just let my inner smartass talk to them because the logical parts of my brain have concluded it's a lost cause to try reasoning with them.

[XCashier]

Stupid should hurt.

It does, but unfortunately, not the stupid themselves. Their stupidity usually hurts everyone they have to deal with.

[HawaiianShirts]

I had to go out countless times to put the cones back in their places after customers moved them...
As soon as SC had moved his car away from the broken pump, I replaced the cones that he had taken away as tho they were merely there for decoration...

This is what baffles me. When I pull into a gas station and see orange cones by a pump, I go to another pump.

It's not because my first thought is, "That pump must be out of order." It's not because my first thought is, "I guess they don't want me using that pump right now." It's not because my first thought is, "They must be trying to direct people to other pumps."

No, I go to another pump because my first thought is more along the lines of, "There's an object blocking my path, and I'm too lazy to stop the car, get out, move the object, get back in the car, and then pull up. That other pump has no objects blocking it; I'll go there because it requires less effort."

How can people be so lazy when it comes to getting them to do the things they need to do while at the same time they're so ambitious that they DO do pretty much everything they shouldn't?

[Argabarga]

It's amazing how much effort people will put into removing an obstacle without considering why it's there in the first place.... and why even removing it won't get them to where they want to be...

Similarly the commercial pumps I fill up my truck from have special keycards to unlock the pumps, so that nobody else can use them since they're just pumps in the middle of nowhere, with no "store" attached.

There used to be old-fashioned "cards" that were like mini computer punchcards you'd insert into a little machine on a post that would unlock them. They've since upgraded to magnetic swipe cards on the pumps to unlock them, (and upwards of 2 years ago sent a memo around to the cardholders that they'd have to get new cards because the punchcards were on the way out.) and just left the old style punchcard equipment abandoned in place rather than remove it.

There are hundreds of these places dotted all over the state that have all upgraded to swipe cards

Yet, not a single one I stop at doesn't have evidence that someone has tried their darndest to MAKE the punchcard reader accept the old, obsolete, and by now long-deactivated punchcards... despite the fact the reader probably isn't even plugged in anymore and most of them have been taped-over or otherwise sealed shut so people get the idea.

Again, EVERY SINGLE ONE I come across has been forced open in a belief that all they have to to is force-feed the card to the reader and the pumps will turn on

[MoonCat]

What does "broken" mean....?? Wha....??

[Teskeria]

I see the problem. you have used a work with too many syllables. Change the sign to something simpler. I personally like ' no work' or if sentences matter 'pump no work' (yes still back grammAr but more sentencey)

[Lace Neil Singer]

XD Yes, more than one syllable confuses customers, how silly of me!

[dalesys]

XD Yes, more than one syllable confuses customers, how silly of me!

Remember, whenever possible, use words of one letter or less:

U R A G D FN S!

[Eevie]

They might learn if perhaps a shock mechanism was hooked up to the broken pump... If not it would be hilarious to eatch... Oh if only...

[Pixilated]

To have to move to another gas pump ... oh, the horror of it ...

[Lace Neil Singer]

It's even funnier when something of the sort happens on Christmas Eve, when we have no means of getting anyone to come and fix the pump til the day after Boxing Day, and even then we'll be lucky to see anyone. However, that is way beyond the understanding of SCs.

Back when I worked on the checkout, once on Christmas Eve three tills went out of commission and one till's belt stopped working. I was on that till, and it was kept open out of desperation with a sign on the front to tell customers that it was a basket till without a working belt. The amount of customers who barked, "Broken? So why don't you fix it?"... well, if I'd had a fiver for every time I'd heard that, I'd have had a very lucrative Christmas that year. XD Customers seem unable to comprehend that we can't just reach into a cupboard and pull out an engineer to fix broken equipment.