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If you're going to write a complaint letter....

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  • If you're going to write a complaint letter....

    ....At least write something that we don't feel ashamed to have to respond to.

    Backstory: I'm one of the people who is assigned to answer emails people send through the company website (besides taking calls... ugh). One of the categories is unhappy with service (real title changed). I stay away from those, but read them from time to time just for my amusement.

    Here are some of the ones I read:

    1. WTF, really....

    SC's email:

    WTF!

    WTF!

    WTF!

    Where is my goddamn laptop, it's been in repair for almost 3 week now!

    WTF

    WTF!

    WTF!

    I swear, one more week and I going into your store and launching a tirade!

    WTF!

    WTF!

    WTF!

    I tell you, you guys suck ass bigtime!

    That was the email. Seriously.

    2. Boilerplate

    The person who responded to the original email used a canned apology template and I guess the customer detected it as such....

    SC's email:

    Just another boilerplate response. I swear, one more stupid response like that without getting anything done and I'M GOING TO LOSE IT ARRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHH!

    3. Awful.

    SC's email:

    Another week without my laptop. I tell you, I wish (now defunct electronics chain) was still around. YOU GUYS ARE AWEFULLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    4. Thinks she knows more than the tech.

    SC's email:

    I am writing in hopes that I can get a least half of my onsite service fee refunded.
    The tech was not snappy in configuring my wires like he should have been and on top of it he was putting down my internet service and security software installations on my computer. Very rude of him to do so!

    Now on to the onsite tech's notes (snipped to only show the relevant info):

    "Client's cables behind the desk were a big mess and it took me a while to sort everything out. Also, she was complaining that when her 3 PC's are online her internet speed slows to a crawl. Found out she is using DSL Lite (768kbps), advised client the only real fix as her router is working fine is to upgrade to at least a 3mbps service. Also, she has 4 legit but conflicting antispyware programs on her main PC. Offered to remove them but she refused."

  • #2
    Those are hilarious.

    My favorite is the guy who threatened to "launch a tirade."
    The best karma is letting a jerk bash himself senseless on the wall of your polite indifference.

    The stupid is strong with this one.

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    • #3
      I have see some like this at my work before. The are next to impossible to respond to because they don't provide any of the needed detail and asking for it usually results in another rant.

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      • #4
        Quoth sld72382 View Post

        I swear, one more week and I going into your store and launching a tirade!
        Oh NO!!

        My knees are quivering with fear. How 'bout you?
        Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

        "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

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        • #5
          I like the ones that accuse me of being a computer before I've even sent them a reply. I want to tell them that I'm not a computer, I've passed all my Turing tests with flying colours.

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          • #6
            A Turing test just proves you have human like intelligence. You could still be a computers
            ludo ergo sum

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            • #7
              Quoth rvdammit View Post
              A Turing test just proves you have human like intelligence. You could still be a computers
              Shhh, be quite before my bosses find that out.
              http://www.deezer.com/#music/album/100130
              Melody Gardot

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