I stuck something where it shouldn't go - it's all your fault!

[Amadan]

Hi guys.

First story...

I'm minding by own business a couple of weeks ago* when a member of the sales staff asked me to speak to a customer with a laptop issue and then made a very quick exit. Uh Oh - it's a bad sign when sales don't hang around.

Well it turns out the customer had been away on holiday and on returning had tried to save her photos from her digital camera to her nice new laptop. Unsurprisingly (considering she was needing help) there was a problem accessing the photos and now the card wouldn't come out. I was getting ready for the wrong type of memory card in the slot issue (v.common) only to find there was only an SD card slot and it still had it's blanker in it.

Turns out the customer had put her camera battery into the expresscard 34 slot and then used the removable blanker to shove it in as far as it would go like some sort of plastic ramrod. There was no way to get this out without a strip down.

I told to the customer that I could attempt remove the battery, that it'd only be £20 for me to look at the machine and a total of £70 (including £20 diagnosis charge) if I could remove it without causing further damage, otherwise it would need to be sent to the manufacturer for repair**.

The customer then calmly asked why it wasn't covered by manufacturer's warranty, stated that I should never have designed the laptop with a slot the right size for the battery and that she'd be calling trading standards to complain, picked up her computer and walked out before I could say anything!

I don't know what medication she was on but I'd like some please.

John.


*well actually I had a laptop in about 90 different bits trying to remove the hard drive whilst suppressing the urge swear and scream about why anyone would bury it under the motherboard without fitting an access panel, but that's a different story completely.

**Every time this sort of thing happens to this specific manufacturer's machines (wrong memory card jammed in reader etc) they replace the motherboard at a rather large cost to the customer, unless the machine is covered by one of our service agreements and then it's a rather large cost to us!

[HYHYBT]

You want medication that turns you into a posterior orifice?

[Amadan]

You want medication that turns you into a posterior orifice?

No - medication that takes you onto another planet. Whatever manages to keep you calm while coming out with these classics must be the goood stuff.

[Polenicus]

Okay, let's count the fail here:

Turns out the customer had put her camera battery into the expresscard 34 slot

Fail #1 (How the hell do you mistake a camera battery for a memory card??)

and then used the removable blanker to shove it in as far as it would go like some sort of plastic ramrod.

Fail #2 (If it won't go in, shove harder! Why is this the solution so many people use with delicate equipment like computers?)

The customer then calmly asked why it wasn't covered by manufacturer's warranty, stated that I should never have designed the laptop with a slot the right size for the battery and that she'd be calling trading standards to complain, picked up her computer and walked out before I could say anything!

Fail #3 (Standard response when someone didn't know what they were doing, KNEW they didn't know what they were doing, knew perfectly well that they should ask, but decided to bull through anyway)

How many computer repairs could be avoided if the people involved had stopped for five minutes to ask someone, or... *GASP*! RTFM?

[Aut]

Okay, let's count the fail here:



Fail #1 (How the hell do you mistake a camera battery for a memory card??)

It's easy. My battery and memory card are the same size and sit right next to each other. If I wasn't observant enough to actually read the cards, That would be trouble.

[Chromatix]

Not if the memory card is, as described, an SD card. No camera battery is that small.

The battery size (Expresscard slot) sounds about right for a recent compact digital - it would probably be bigger for a digital SLR. Most film SLRs had a pair of button cells to run the light meter and timing, possibly more if they had autofocus or autowind.

However, we all know how technologically illiterate people can be...

[Hyndis]

We once had a "tech" who attempted to install a CPU onto a motherboard that used a different socket type. It wouldn't fit. So he used a hammer.



Needless to say, he wasn't employed for very long.

[Shalom]

I assume, given the level of Clue exhibited by this luser (i.e. not a whole helluva lot), that she isn't likely ever to need to use the Expresscard slot for its intended purpose. This being the case, why even bother extracting the battery? The computer should function just fine with it in there, and it'll cost her a whole lot less than £70 for a new battery for her camera... Just shove in some cotton wool or something so it doesn't rattle around, tell her the computer ate it, and she should go get another battery.

[Chromatix]

Actually I'm left wondering if she even noticed the SD card in the camera. But since those are usually sold distinct from the camera, and she would have had to put it in herself, I don't think that's a valid excuse.

Better solution: use a USB cable to attach the camera to the computer. It'll still need the battery recharging every so often, but now she doesn't need to know about the SD card.

[Fryk]

HAHA, Hyndis, my wife's cousin did the same thing with a RAM card.

[Amadan]

We once had a "tech" who attempted to install a CPU onto a motherboard that used a different socket type. It wouldn't fit. So he used a hammer.



Needless to say, he wasn't employed for very long.

Yeah we have a few staff like that here, luckily they're all sales staff. There's a reason the company implemented a compulsory full 2 week training and assessment period for techs at a restricted number of stores where you work/train under supervision of the lead tech until they authorise you to be signed off by the training store's general manager - no authorisation or sign off = no job!

Reminds me of the recent event - sales staff sold a graphics card upgrade for one of those dell hybrid slimline machines. It was a double width card! It was as big as the computer! Not to mention the "desktop" is really a laptop with no screen and certainly no expansion ports or a psu anywhere nearly powerful enough to run a card like that - it has an intel on board gpu!

Needless to say my second tech ripped him a new one the next day, luckily it was my day off or I'd have put my foot up his backside for not coming and asking!

Actually I'm left wondering if she even noticed the SD card in the camera. But since those are usually sold distinct from the camera, and she would have had to put it in herself, I don't think that's a valid excuse.

Better solution: use a USB cable to attach the camera to the computer. It'll still need the battery recharging every so often, but now she doesn't need to know about the SD card.

It was probably set up by someone else. It may have even been setup in store, most places don't mind doing it as long as they're not heaving.

I assume, given the level of Clue exhibited by this luser (i.e. not a whole helluva lot), that she isn't likely ever to need to use the Expresscard slot for its intended purpose. This being the case, why even bother extracting the battery? The computer should function just fine with it in there, and it'll cost her a whole lot less than £70 for a new battery for her camera... Just shove in some cotton wool or something so it doesn't rattle around, tell her the computer ate it, and she should go get another battery.

It probably would be a cheaper, on the other hand my job is to do chargeable services and she did ask me if I could remove it. She was lucky she came to our branch, we're one of the few who's techs (well two of us anyway) have company approval to strip laptops, normally it would cost much more as it wouldn't be done in house.

Also what happens if the camera battery shorts on the laptop, or the battery degraded and leaked? Not likely I'll admit but if it happened within the customer's warranty period it wouldn't be covered unless I'd told her it was fine to leave in - then she may have has ground to claim any costs for repair against us.

The company is very twitchy about liability in regards to warranties and "customer service"*, advising a customer to "leave it in" could get a tech in serious trouble (the CS or sales reps might get away with a verbal warning not to do it again).

John




*Usually all a customer has to do is escalate above store level and they get pretty much what they want. For example we just had a 3 year old TV in with screen burn (someting specifically NOT overed under the 1 year warranty) even though they'd not taken the extended warrenty (not covered by that either) they were still getting vouchers for the amount they'd paid to get a new TV. This meant the were getting a new TV at much better spec.

Grrr - it really annoys me that the comany makes us take all the stick for "Company Policy" and then the higher up's just roll over when they get even a whiff of trouble. Especialy as most of our store staff are on minimum wage.

[underemployeed]

In college I had friends who did tech support for university students. Um, one horror story was being sent out because a student couldn't get on the internet. The rooms all had standard Ethernet jacks that use Rj45 ends, well because the cable was to big to fit from the wall into his computer the student took out a knife and whittled the plug down so he could cram it into the modem jack....

Don't know who was more clueless the guy or the tech because the tech asked, at the point of the cable not fitting why did you think it was a good idea to use a knife to make it fit??? Turns out he didn't have an Ethernet card, go figure.


Amadan, do you work for a certain squad? I have found deny everything and admit nothing to be effective when you know you screwed up, along with general cluelessnes.

[Amadan]

Amadan, do you work for a certain squad? I have found deny everything and admit nothing to be effective when you know you screwed up, along with general cluelessnes.

That sounds about right.

Err maybe, although I may well work for one of their competitors. Until I get through my Cisco certifications anyway.