How to brew coffee... NOT!

[dalesys]

How to brew coffee... NOT! or outsmarted by Mr. Carafe.

• Double filter
• No filter at all
  
• Leave used grounds
  
• Dump fresh on top of used
  
• No coffee at all
  
• Leave spout over reservoir instead of filter cup
  
• Put carafe of fresh water on hot plate instead of into reservoir
  
• Leave carafe on counter while brewing
• Don't turn on heat
  

[Chromatix]

* Leave full (or partially full) carafe under spout while brewing.

(A reasonable mistake in this case, since there are two machines next to each other, but it makes just as big a mess on the floor. And no, it wasn't me.)

[MoonCat]

Put carafe of fresh water on hot plate instead of into reservoir

I actually did that once. I have no idea why.

[ellie]

I once forgot to dump the old coffee and put in fresh when I went to make a pot. So essentially I made a pot of hot caramel colored water.

[dalesys]

I almost scored a new one this morning:

• Pour fresh water in filter cup

[garth1]

How to brew coffee... NOT! or outsmarted by Mr. Carafe.

• Double filter
• No filter at all
  
• Leave used grounds
  
• Dump fresh on top of used
  
• No coffee at all
  
• Leave spout over reservoir instead of filter cup
  
• Put carafe of fresh water on hot plate instead of into reservoir
  
• Leave carafe on counter while brewing
• Don't turn on heat
  

In my 12 years of working for 7-11, I have done all this and more. If it involved brewing coffee or tea the wrong way, I did it.

[Merriweather]

* Leave full (or partially full) carafe under spout while brewing.

(A reasonable mistake in this case, since there are two machines next to each other, but it makes just as big a mess on the floor. And no, it wasn't me.)

Ummm, that would be me...

I did that with a basic old Mr. Coffee machine, at an office, leaving some coffee in the pot when I set up a new pot to brew.

In my defense -

It was one of my very first temp office jobs.
I was all of 18 years old.
I had never brewed coffee in my life.
Neither me nor my parents had ever owned a coffee maker like that.

I still remember grabbing massive amounts of paper towels and stopping th emess before it got down into the drawers in the file cabinet it was sitting on....

Luckily, everyone was very nice, probably because few people can yell at a girl who's 18 (and looked about 14) and is obviously about ready to cry.

[ZumZum]

I almost scored a new one this morning:

• Pour fresh water in filter cup

Guilty of doing that one. In my defense, I was very tired and hadn't had my coffee yet......

[MoonCat]

I brewed a pot of hot water once. Forgot to put coffee in the filter, poured in the water, turned it on...voila, nice pot of hot water. Not as tasty as coffee, though!

[Food Lady]

I only have an espresso maker, not a regular coffee maker. So I can't do any of those.

[DGoddessChardonnay]

Try using way too much coffee and it comes out as thick, black goo.

I recently had to put a stop to other people in the house using MY coffeemaker because of this (namely the painter who was here, who turned out to be a bigger coffee freak than me.)

Thank Goodness he no longer works for us now and we've found someone else to handle the odds and ends. Otherwise I'd be teetering on the edge of going off to prison for a very long time.

[dragon_wings]

<snip>
Thank Goodness he no longer works for us now and we've found someone else to handle the odds and ends. Otherwise I'd be teetering on the edge of going off to prison for a very long time.

Do not mess with a coffee/caffeine addict's means of getting said coffee/caffeine. :P

[DGoddessChardonnay]

Do not mess with a coffee/caffeine addict's means of getting said coffee/caffeine. :P

And don't mess with anything in MY house that's going to set me off, either.

If you want coffee, fine, I can make it for you. But wasting my coffee (went through a LARGE can of coffee in a month's time, when it usually lasts around 2-3 months) and watering it down or making a full pot but only drinking 2 cups and leaving the rest to get cold really steams me.

Don't get me started on my Coffee Mate either . . .

[Midnight_Angel]

Try using way too much coffee and it comes out as thick, black goo.

Huh? I could have sworn the right amount of ground coffee was 'fill up the filter to the brim, then remove about one spoonful from the top to make some space for the hot wter coming in'...

[Chromatix]

No, usually the right amount is about half the depth of the filter - which, because it is cone shaped, is a good deal less than half the volume.

Somehow the machines at the office manage to make awful coffee anyway, so I bring in my own instant and use that instead.