The Tow Files: Sept-DUMB-ber

[dawnfire]

Ahoy, Captain Ahrr-gabarga! I've even got pirate garb and pistols (actually water guns made to look like antique pistols). And I've got to say, I love the mental image of a tow truck with a Jolly Roger flying from it!

with the crew hanging off the back

[Tee]

A cross-eyed pony fed on a diet of muffins probably wouldn't have messed up THAT bad, but there you go....

This made my night, hadn't been expecting it. XD

[WishfulSpirit]

The bit with Slim could only have been better had Arga said Slim would be getting a commendation for doing a job as he'd been trained to. The suckomer's head would have exploded.

[Seshat]

I could so use a refresher right now, hey, Barkeep! You still got wood alcohol on tap, right? Make it a double.

Calling Jester!

Ya know, I think I should just get myself a big ol' Pirate flag for the truck

Where has the rum gone?

[DiRF]

A cross-eyed pony fed on a diet of muffins probably wouldn't have messed up THAT bad, but there you go....

I just don't know what went wrong!

[Jester]

Calling Jester!

Yo! Sorry for being late to the party, I was being distracted by a hot nurse.

Captain Arga, I have a full pirate costume, and a sword, and an extensive knowledge of rum and beer, all ready and available for service!

[An Haddock]

So, looks like the Hunchback of Senior Court and her trusty sidekick The Squealstress have been at it again, looking for cars that don't have permits and calling us to remove them post haste!!!! We can't have ANARCHY like this!!!!

This is literally her hobby. (and that of her friend, the only friend she apparently has in the whole complex, no surprise) Some oldsters browse Ebay, some play cards, some spoil their grandkids rotten, and some, are just plain rotten, like her.

My godfather had a neighbor like this years ago. Guy in his late 70's with too much free time. He'd go around the neighborhood looking for violations - grass too high, broken sidewalk, low-hanging tree branches, etc.

One day he finally went full-on crackers and made himself a uniform. After calling around a hundred complaints in to the zoning office in a day, they told him that any further contact, aside from reporting his house being on fire or someone chasing him with a chainsaw, would be considered harassment and he'd be fined/jailed.

That took care of wanna-be zoning officer.

[An Haddock]

I wanna be a pirate!!

International Talk Like a Pirate Day is rapidly approaching. I've got my eye patch ready to go.

Just 11 days away! GARRRR!

[catcul]

AVAST! I be from Greenville. I be coming for your car, matey!

[An Haddock]

AVAST! I be from Greenville. I be coming for your car, matey!

Ye not be takin' my vessel over my dead parrot's body! READY THE CANNONS, LADS, AND GIVE 'EM WHAT FOR!

[mjr]

I have a full pirate costume, and a sword, and an extensive knowledge of rum and beer

LOL...that sounds like the beginnings of a "Role Playing" scenario...

[mjr]

Speaking of Pirates...

You guys are aware that for a brief time the Enterprise D had a pirate on board, right?

Tasha YARRR!

[wolfie]

After calling around a hundred complaints in to the zoning office in a day, they told him that any further contact, aside from reporting his house being on fire or someone chasing him with a chainsaw, would be considered harassment and he'd be fined/jailed.

Gotta love those explicit lists - sounds like if someone chased him with a MACHETE, the zoning office would go after HIM and not the guy chasing him. After all, it's not a chainsaw.

[catcul]

Gotta love those explicit lists - sounds like if someone chased him with a MACHETE, the zoning office would go after HIM and not the guy chasing him. After all, it's not a chainsaw.

So one can chase him with a cutlass and the cops won't do anything? Good to know.

[Ted_The_IT_Guy]

I'd like to volunteer. I'm told I'm quite talented with voices, and can do a mean pirate.

I also am fostering a dog for a rescue group, who has the name of Long John Silver, as the little guy (schnoodle, schnauzer/poodle mix) got hit by a car and lost his right eye. I can find a dog sized eyepatch, says I! Also, says I, you need a mascot. He's adorable.

2 in the cab beside Capt. Arga, you'd also need someone standing outside on the top of the cab (like Captain Jack Sparrow in his introductory scene on the dinghy in Curse Of The Black Pearl), yelling out things like "CLIMB TO THE YARDARM, MR. CHRISTIAN!!!!!", and "WHY ARE THE PERMITS ALWAYS GONE?!?"