Selfish is as selfish does

[edible_hat]

This women with a gaggle of children came into the store to buy a bunch of food and use the payphone. All the time the kids are going "Mum can I get this?" and "I want that" and the mum's saying "no, shut up, what I need is more important than you" and so on like that. (so basically they're all being selfish and not listening to each other).

Eventually the woman got on the payphone, the kids were still hassling her, she yelled "SHUT UP AND GO OUTSIDE!" then started apologizing to whoever she was on the phone to (trying to explain she was talking to the kids and not them). Some kind of conversation followed, ending in "I'M NOT GOING TO PAY THAT BILL!" (throws down the phone hard enough to make the bell ring, did I mention it's a really old payphone with a mechanical ringer?)

The kids came back into the store and started going on about what they wanted (and ignoring their mother, each other, and everybody else in the area). One had $20 which she spent on snack foods.

Then the mother said "Where's that $20 you have? I need smokes!" and took the kid's bag... well she tried to explain that she just spent her money but the mum wasn't listening. Until she'd finished searching the bag to find only some small change, at which point she threw a tantrum and the manager ordered her to leave the store.

But it didn't end there - half an hour later a customer said "Did you know there's somebody asking people for spare change in the car wash?" The manager went to look on the CCTV and said "It's that crazy lady again". He went out to confront her but she ran off.

About an hour after that she came back and apologised, I presume that somewhere in between she scraped together enough small stuff to get some kind of nicotiene into her system.

[PepperElf]

you know ... i don't care if people want to smoke but... when the cancer-sticks are more important than paying your bills or taking care of the kids... there's some serious issues there.

[Cyphr]

its amazing how much people's ideals are distoreted nowadays.

[HawaiianShirts]

I'd say, "At least she apologized," but I wouldn't mean it. Not only is she likely making her kids (and herself) miserable, she's setting a horrible example for them. Part of me can see her desperation and wants to feel sorry for her, but I just can't do it.

you know ... i don't care if people want to smoke but... when the cancer-sticks are more important than paying your bills or taking care of the kids... there's some serious issues there.

I'll agree completely with you on that one. I worked one summer painting student apartments on a college campus. I was the only non-smoker in the group. It would have meant that I got paid the same for doing more work, but the guy writing the checks worked with us most days and stated explicitly that there were no paid breaks. He kept his word on it.

Anyway, for part of the job we were in another city. The boss let us stay in some of the already-painted apartments for free, so all we had to pay for was food. One evening after work, I overheard this from three of them:
1 - "Hey, we should go get some pizza and drinks or something."
2 - "Yeah, that sounds great. I'm really hungry."
3 - "I don't think we can, guys."
2 - "Why not?"
3 - "'Cause we don't have enough money."
1 - "We don't?"
3 - "Nope. We got enough for either pizza or smokes."
1 - "Oh, s***."
3 - "Yeah."
2 - "Are we out of smokes?"
1 - "I think I got two left."
2 - "We better go get some more, then."
1 - "Yeah, forget the pizza, man. Let's go get some smokes."
2 - "I guess I'm not that hungry. Don't forget your lighter, dude."

[Sylvia727]

Wait, the mother asked the daughter for the $20? There's something very wrong there. Either (1) the mom gave the kid a 20 and told her to hold it for her, then the daughter spent it on junk food, and then the mom failed to discipline her for stealing, or (2) more likely, the mom knew the kid had $20 and went through the girl's purse to steal it. That is despicable. Kids too young for a job (and I doubt this mom gave them allowances) work relatively hard for cash. Mowing lawns and changing diapers is hard for someone fresh off the playground. If the girl had come by that money honestly, no way her mother should have tried to take it off her. This is how not to teach your children the value of working hard, or at least budgeting their spending money.

[Can I Help Your A$$?]

Ah, addiction. Makes you do things that you'll have to block out of your mind right quick.

[protege]

Kids too young for a job (and I doubt this mom gave them allowances) work relatively hard for cash. Mowing lawns and changing diapers is hard for someone fresh off the playground. If the girl had come by that money honestly, no way her mother should have tried to take it off her. This is how not to teach your children the value of working hard, or at least budgeting their spending money.

I know what that's like. I started delivering newspapers when I was in 5th grade, and continued doing that all through high school. Nearly all the cash I made...was used by my parents to pay *their* bills Seriously--I'd no more than deposit the cash into the account, when it started disappearing again. When I went through the canceled checks for things like groceries, school tuition, car repairs, etc. totaling several thousand dollars Needless to say, when I turned 18, the first thing I did was open my *own* account, and keep their names off of it!

[Brightglaive]

I'll agree completely with you on that one. I worked one summer painting student apartments on a college campus. I was the only non-smoker in the group. It would have meant that I got paid the same for doing more work, but the guy writing the checks worked with us most days and stated explicitly that there were no paid breaks. He kept his word on it.

Smoking while you're painting is really not the best idea unless you like the idea of a KB (KABOOM!!!!!) event involving you at it's center. I take it they smoked away from the paint?

And the fact that a mother would try to take $20 from her daughter (Which I seriously doubt she gave to her daughter to hold; Her daughter probably earned it on her own) is really despicable. I feel sorry for those children!!! It makes me want to cry for them when I hear stories about horrible parents like that.

[Talon]

I know what that's like. I started delivering newspapers when I was in 5th grade, and continued doing that all through high school. Nearly all the cash I made...was used by my parents to pay *their* bills Seriously--I'd no more than deposit the cash into the account, when it started disappearing again. When I went through the canceled checks for things like groceries, school tuition, car repairs, etc. totaling several thousand dollars Needless to say, when I turned 18, the first thing I did was open my *own* account, and keep their names off of it!

Real charming parents you got there. My mother and I got along about as well as a snake and a mongoose growing up, but she would never in a million years steal from me.

Did your parents ever own up to what they did? Or did they get pissed at you when you turned 18 and cut off the gravy tap?

[Slow-Jo]

I know what that's like. I started delivering newspapers when I was in 5th grade, and continued doing that all through high school. Nearly all the cash I made...was used by my parents to pay *their* bills Seriously--I'd no more than deposit the cash into the account, when it started disappearing again. When I went through the canceled checks for things like groceries, school tuition, car repairs, etc. totaling several thousand dollars Needless to say, when I turned 18, the first thing I did was open my *own* account, and keep their names off of it!

my mom was the same way. my uncle made a little collage fund for us by nailing a wine box (WAY back when wine came in boxes lol) and made a slot in the top. he slipped $20 in each box (=about 30-40 now) well my mom got a hold of them ripped them apart and stole the money for smokes.
i remember once waking up to find my mom digging in my closet for my money stash. i think i was maybe in grade 4.

[edible_hat]

Come to think of it, it is more likely that the daughter earned the money herself. While she paid, she had the sort of proud demeanor that kids get when they spend money they earned themselves.

[tropicsgoddess]

Wow....that's some pretty up priorities for her to put buying death sticks before taking care of her kids and bills.

[Geek King]

I know what that's like. I started delivering newspapers when I was in 5th grade, and continued doing that all through high school. Nearly all the cash I made...was used by my parents to pay *their* bills Seriously--I'd no more than deposit the cash into the account, when it started disappearing again. When I went through the canceled checks for things like groceries, school tuition, car repairs, etc. totaling several thousand dollars Needless to say, when I turned 18, the first thing I did was open my *own* account, and keep their names off of it!

Protege, this is OT, but you really need to look up an Anime called "Combat Butler Hayate." The main character has the same problem, and is even sold into slavery to cover his parents' debts. It ends up being a comedy, and quite good though.

[Sylvia727]

While she paid, she had the sort of proud demeanor that kids get when they spend money they earned themselves.

Exactly my point. Parents are supposed to teach their children how to function in society. Little kids earning their own money and then spending it on treats teaches them the value of hard work. That poor girl was learning that those were her candy bars, and she had earned them. She should be proud, but with a junkie mother stealing her labor she will only learn (best case scenario) that people are scum and she should hide her money if she wants to keep it.

Oh, and @ protege et al, my first job was cashiering at a pizzeria. My sperm donor still lived with us and he told me that he would cash my paychecks for me. I made about $50-60 a week, which is quite a big deal when you don't have any expenses except for clothes and a cell phone. I kept track on a tab of how much he still owed me. When it hit $800, I made my mother open another checking account and put my name on it so I could cash my checks. After two or three weeks, he asked me why I hadn't given him my paychecks, and got super-pissed when I told him it was because he owed me $800. Later, I found out he was a junkie. Still later, I found out he was overcharging me for my cell phone and underpaying me for my babysitting. Bastard still owes me over $1,000, but I of course will never see it.

[protege]

Did your parents ever own up to what they did? Or did they get pissed at you when you turned 18 and cut off the gravy tap?

Nope. They either deny it, or justify it...by using the fact that they were having money problems then. The last straw came, after I'd switched the accounts. When I was still living at home, I kept some funds in the old account for 'emergencies.' Most of the time, my checkbook was hidden...so you can imagine my surprise when I got the last statement...and noticed that they'd written a check for $600 to get their damn car fixed When confronted, my mother actually *refused* to pay me back. Instead, she said that cash was to be used towards my "rent payments" since I was working, and living there. Now, my rent wasn't very much--only $100 each month--but having nearly an entire month's pay *really* hurt at the time...especially when you consider I had school loans and car payments!