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I woke up this morning and instantly knew it was going to be a fun and exciting day because my throat was so swollen that when I went, "Ahhh!" my tonsils choked my uvula. It was also going to be fun because when I tried to call and get someone to cover my shift, no one answered the phone (this gets better shortly). So I go in and tell the boss right off that I would need to leave at some point and see a doctor and that if I was contagious, nope, not ganna come back.
So I go in complete with raspy voice, flushed cheeks and a nice set of dark circles under my eyes. It kind of looked like someone slapped my cheeks before punching me in the eyes. I sounded (and still do) like an elderly woman with a bad smoker's cough.
So on to the job. I got this douchebag.
Me: I want to die. Please kill me.
DB: Douchebag. Of Course.
J: Super nice, still pretty new to the job though.
DB: Wow, you look terrible!
Me: Thanks..
DB: Wow, you sound terrible too! I bet it hurts to talk!
Me: -nod-
DB: Cool, so I need you to tell me everything you know about Xbox 360s, I've never owned one and I'm interested in buying one.
Me: (As I'm trying not to talk and just process shipment because it doesn't require throat usage...and also get J into talking to customers more) Okay, well, my associate J here can tell you pretty much all you need to know.
DB: Um, well I'd rather you tell me. He doesn't look like he knows about it.
Me:
I assure you he does.
J:
Sir I can answer any question you might have, as you can tell, Marty can't talk very well right now so you may be able to understand me a little better. 
DB: I don't want to talk to you, you don't know anything.
At this point, I pulled the Ganna Vomit face card and high tailed it to the back where I proceeded to live up to my deck and upchuck my breakfast. When I came back out the guy was gone and J said he just heavy-sighed and walked out when I ran back. At that point Idiot Boy called and said he was too hungover to take my shift (glad to see one of us was genuinely sick!), but I managed to convince someone else to come in. I don't know why he was so dead set on talking to me, but I was obviously not set up to make lengthy conversation.
And hey, guess what! I have mono!
So I go in complete with raspy voice, flushed cheeks and a nice set of dark circles under my eyes. It kind of looked like someone slapped my cheeks before punching me in the eyes. I sounded (and still do) like an elderly woman with a bad smoker's cough.
So on to the job. I got this douchebag.
Me: I want to die. Please kill me.
DB: Douchebag. Of Course.
J: Super nice, still pretty new to the job though.
DB: Wow, you look terrible!
Me: Thanks..
DB: Wow, you sound terrible too! I bet it hurts to talk!
Me: -nod-
DB: Cool, so I need you to tell me everything you know about Xbox 360s, I've never owned one and I'm interested in buying one.
Me: (As I'm trying not to talk and just process shipment because it doesn't require throat usage...and also get J into talking to customers more) Okay, well, my associate J here can tell you pretty much all you need to know.
DB: Um, well I'd rather you tell me. He doesn't look like he knows about it.
Me:
I assure you he does.J:
Sir I can answer any question you might have, as you can tell, Marty can't talk very well right now so you may be able to understand me a little better. DB: I don't want to talk to you, you don't know anything.
At this point, I pulled the Ganna Vomit face card and high tailed it to the back where I proceeded to live up to my deck and upchuck my breakfast. When I came back out the guy was gone and J said he just heavy-sighed and walked out when I ran back. At that point Idiot Boy called and said he was too hungover to take my shift (glad to see one of us was genuinely sick!), but I managed to convince someone else to come in. I don't know why he was so dead set on talking to me, but I was obviously not set up to make lengthy conversation.
And hey, guess what! I have mono!
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