No, you are NOT "The Man"

[Dave1982]

I was approached yesterday by an older gentleman, who asked me for a suggestion for a gift for a male college student, and that it had to be something in our store, and it had to be off-beat.

Well, not knowing any more than that, it's awfully difficult to think of anything, and besides, Staples isn't exactly the place for off-beat gifts (at least, once all the various Christmas promotional crap is sold off).

Oh yeah, and suggesting gifts is NOT part of my job description, last I checked. Nevertheless, I suggested perhaps a flash drive or some blank CDs/DVDs

SC: NO! Everyone thinks of that! I need something DIFFERENT!

Me: Well, I really can't think of anything that we carry that would be good.

SC: BAAH!!! *waves dismissively at me and walks away*

OK, that was rude of you.

Then he got on his phone and asked for a suggestion from whomever he'd called. A minute later, he asks me about an electric stapler, which he ended up buying.

SC *on phone*: Yeah, I got him an electric stapler! Am I The Man or what???

It was all I could do to not laugh aloud. An electric stapler! Oh yes, that's what EVERY male college student wants these days!!! Oh yes, you ARE the Man!! </sarcasm>

If he hadn't insisted on buying something at my store, I could have suggested he go to a certain "specialty store" about 20 minutes away, specifically to the not-advertised "adult area" in the back. There's plenty of off-beat things there that I'm sure many a college student would enjoy, and much cheaper than a $40 electric stapler.

[Hobbs]

Reminds me. I could really use an electric stapler. It'll help out when I need to write essays and reports for my COC.

[Jester]

I have been The Man many times in my life.
I have seen other people, both men and women, be The Man as well.
And they have involved many different situations, settings, dialogue, and props.
And in not ONE of those did an electric fucking stapler play any part whatsoever.
Not. Fucking. One.

Dude is not The Man. He is, quite simply, The Douchebag.

[ditchdj]

Yeah, maybe an electric stapler to staple something into his stupid, pointed head.

[SG15Z]

Hm.... I could use an electric stapler....

But yeah he's totally not The Man.

[Legal Eagle]

I know when i was in college there was nothing i desired more than an electric stapler. someone down the hall from me had one and he held wild stapling parties most nights, but me with me little manual stapler couldn't get in.

I still don't have an electric stapler, no wonder i'm single.

[Mystic]

I actually had to google what an electric stapler was...

[tropicsgoddess]

An electric stapler as a gift? Wooo....nice!

[Mr Hero]

If he hadn't insisted on buying something at my store, I could have suggested he go to a certain "specialty store" about 20 minutes away, specifically to the not-advertised "adult area" in the back. There's plenty of off-beat things there that I'm sure many a college student would enjoy, and much cheaper than a $40 electric stapler.

Would they be offbeat items or would they be beat off items?

[cinema guy]

Was it ... a Swingline stapler?

[Dave1982]

yes, but not a red one

and there are what could be called beat off items there. that part of the store is half "adult items" and half head shop.

[Broomjockey]

that part of the store is half "adult items" and half head shop.

*giggles madly* "head shop" and "adult items" in the same sentence does not tend to paint the picture you were originally going for.

[Jester]

Was it ... a Swingline stapler?

I don't know if they make electric staplers.

Of course if they do, someone in here will correct me.

[Can I Help Your A$$?]

Hmm..."off beat" he says? He wants something "cool" from a, how you say "Bureau En Gros?"

Yeah, he's what we in SubGenius land call a "Pink Boy."

[JustaCashier]

The old guy probably isn't up on the current slang, and the kid actually said that he wanted to nail some chicks in College!

Mike