The line would go much faster if you...

[RogueOne]

lso, change your toddler's diaper; we don't want fecal contamination in our store because your child chose to smear its contents EVERYWHERE within their reach. (yes, that actually happened, to my horror)

I gotta stop reading these boards while eating.

[greensinestro]

Get off the damn phone (the one that keeps repeating)

Buy your cigarettes at the customer service counter first, not send the bagger there after your total has been rung up.

Stop trying to use a coupon that is not good for a name brand not related to the other.

Have your coupons ready instead of ripping them at the counter.

Stop arguing with the cashier about the "10 items or less" rule when you clearly have 37 items in your cart.

Get off the damn phone (again)

[greensinestro]

At the post office

Have your envelopes stamped and ready at the mailbox instead of driving up, then licking your envelopes closed, then applying your stamps.

Inside the post office:

Have your papers ready and know for sure if you are going to insure your package or not. This includes registered mail, insurance, and upgrades to your service.

[greensinestro]

And once again, get off your damn phone.

[BDbuddy23]

The same people who complain about the length of the line are the SAME people who aren't ready/are time wasters when its their turn to get checked!

[XCashier]

• If the door does not open, don't yank and pull and tug on it until the hinges get bent. The door is not stuck, it is LOCKED. The reason it is locked follows:
• Read the "Store Hours" sign that is posted on or next to the front door. If you show up before the opening time or after the closing time, that means that the store is closed. No amount of whining, window tapping, door yanking or evil glares to the employee will open the store.
• Don't show up first thing in the morning, pick up a pack of Wrigley's gum and pay for it with a $100 bill. We don't have enough in the till to break it, and we certainly are not impressed that you have a big note. Whoopee.
• And for the love of all things that don't suck, GET OFF THE DAMNED PHONE!!!

[DesignFox]

[*]And for the love of all things that don't suck, GET OFF THE DAMNED PHONE!!!

Hey, XCashier, can I steal that for a siggy? I just love the way you put that!

oh let's see, I thought of a few more today...

* wait your turn in line, come up when I call you, not before! I may still be busy with my current customer, and it is VERY rude for you to interrupt them while they are being helped. I don't care if you "just have a quick question". Five people and their Five quick questions just screwed an entire line of people into waiting longer than they had to.

* When I ask everyone to form ONE line, in THAT direction...please comply! Having one line makes things go MUCH more smoothly- and this way, we don't get confused as to who is NEXT!

[Dave1982]

•If you feel that there is a legitimate problem with a price, do not blame ME for it; I do not populate the pricing database. Please approach the situation calmly and we'll take care of it. Pointing fingers and making a scene only prevents me from getting someone to do a price check

Similarly....

•Please to not wait until AFTER the transaction is complete to ask about a price. We spent good money on those screens for a reason: so you can see exactly what we are doing. Pay attention. Once it's done, it's done. Asking after the fact only causes a major delay for everyone.

•Do NOT approach me from behind to ask a question, especially when I have a long line in front of me. We pay the people on the floor good money to answer your stupid questions. I am being paid to check the people in front of me. If you insist on asking me a question, then get in line and wait your turn.

[basketseller]

My additions:

dispute the price BEFORE I swipe your credit card not after.
Don't get pissy with me if you don't tell me your price disputes after your card is swiped when I tell you to go to returns to get it taken care of
GET OFF THE DAMN PHONE. IT IS RUDE!!!!!!!!!!!!

[XCashier]

Hey, XCashier, can I steal that for a siggy? I just love the way you put that!

Sure! Wow, I'm quoteworthy!

[csdrone]

• Do not exaggerate how long you have been waiting: we can see you and know it has not been 5 minutes much less an hour.
• Threats to "Take my business elsewhere" do NOT mean I am going to get fired for policy violations!
• If you do not have valid ID, do NOT expect me to cash your check.
• If you are "in every week" I would know you by now. And how are you driving without a DL?
• Be aware of the line of people behind you.

It was a crappy day.

[jackiemich]

Being a WalMart slave as a cashier, I feel your all's pain. We get a lot of the ultra rich people who shop here and complain about the quality of our stuff. If they are so rich why are they shopping at WalMart? Besides the other complaints, here are a few more that personally irritate me.
Please remove your own bags from the bagging area.
After I tell you that your card has been declined and if you have anything else to pay with, do not tell me that I have been rude to you and tell me that I need a job that doesn't involve customer service.
Do not yell and holler when I have to get a price check when you obviously have put a childs pair of shoes inside an adults shoe box then tell me that I have to take the price on the box. (Price on the tag was 19.95, box was 8.95) I really don't have to do that no matter who told you that wrong bit of information. We go by what is on the shoes, not the box just for that reason.
Oh, and if I am working on the express lane, please wait until I am finished with the customer in front of you before you start placing your items on the counter. We don't have dividers so I can't tell where yours start and the other ends.
On the regular lanes, use the dividers. Or if you feel the need not to use the divider, at least put more than an inch of space between your order and the first person.
Be sure that you actually bought the product that you are trying to use the coupon for. My computer tells me when you didn't buy the right product or the right size. If the coupon says you need 3 items, please bring 3 items and do not get mad when I catch you trying to buy just one item and use the coupon.
No, we don't accept expired coupons.
Do not tell me that I look like I need something to do. Or I look bored. Or I need to start earning my money. Or while I am watching the self checkouts, Do you get paid just to stand there? All of these are very irritating and will get you a nasty glare from me.
There is more, but right now I need to get to work. Thanks, that was very theraputic.

[Becks]

Buy your cigarettes at the customer service counter first, not send the bagger there after your total has been rung up.

What if it's a particular store's policy that cigarettes can only be bought at the register? (Ha, unless you're an employee. Then you get to go to the podium and buy them.)

GET OFF YOUR PHONE!!!!!! NO ONE IS IMPRESSED!!!!!!!!!!

Why do I want to say "Don't forget rule #8!!!"?

[DGoddessChardonnay]

Get off the bleeping phone already . . . can't stress that enough.

Make sure you have enough money in the bank before you come to the grocery store.

If you card comes up declined due to insufficient funds, DO NOT hold up my lengthening line arguing with both me and the CSR about it. Call your bleeping card company and discuss it with them - outside the store - and quit holding up the line.

Make sure your coupons aren't expired

Have a freakin' pen to write your check with and have it ready BEFORE the total button is pressed.

If you look under 40 and you're buying either tobacco or alcohol, bring your ID with you.

Make sure you have proper ID. That foreign immigration-issued ID isn't recognized by our company is being proper ID. We need either a state DL, state ID card, or US military ID.

Know where your children are. Make sure you have them all with you before you get in line or at least take them outside and put them on leashes.

Don't stand there in line SCREAMING for so-and-so to come on. This isn't Grandaddy's barnyard and it only tells on you how you were raised - with NO manners. Even worse if you've got people behind you and you won't move out of your spot.

Again, GET OFF THE DAMN CELLPHONE

[blaubent]

Mine: Please control your kids. I absolutely hate piercing screams (from children who are old enough to know better) to the ear when my coworker is trying to give me info to help you.

Secondly, the price for the item is below the item if it is on a shelf. If it is on a peg/hook, it is the price above.

Thirdly, if I am behind the counter, doing work between ringing customers, I am not hiding on you. If I was hiding on you, do you think you would have found me? Honestly, if I were hiding, I would have found a much better spot than behind the counter.