More stories from putt-putt

[Solumina]

Pep=bad?
I had a very normal, friendly chat with a group of people as they were getting some clubs. As the group was walking away I heard one of the ladies say “Ugh can you believe how fucking cheerful she was?” Apparently I am just too darn happy and people are not allowed to be happy at work…except the other day I had a guest tell me that I was his favorite person here because of how nice and happy I always am. I guess I have to find the correct balance of pep.


I am not here so that you can get around your fees
Here at the “Gemstone Resort” guest have to pay for things like local phone calls and internet (but only in room we do have free computers by the front desk that guests can use 24/7). People will call us at the desk and ask if we can look something up. I have no problem doing this but if you have me look up literally a dozen things I’m going to just tell you to use the free computers, I am not your personal google. You don’t want to leave your room? Fine, the internet is $X.XX a night or $X.XX for a week. Do not whine, it will just make me hate you more.

Also when you come to the pool do not ask if you can call out, unless it is an emergency I will not let you dial the number. If you need to call for information or to set up a reservation with a local business then I will gladly call for you and hand you the phone. It only took one person saying that they wanted to set up a tee time and then calling their buddy for me to realize this is what people will do.


More fun with geese!
What is it with you people and the damn geese? Surly some of you have seen them before? Maybe? Not even on tv? I guess if you had I wouldn’t have to deal with conversations like this:

Guest: You really should do something about all of these diseased geese on property.
Me: I’m sorry but I’m not really sure what you are talking about.
Guest: Are you blind?!? They are everywhere!
Me: As far as I know there are all of the geese are all fairly healthy besides some of them limping (mostly from getting hit by speeding guests, the poor things).
Guest: Look there are some right over there *points*
Me: Miss those are all healthy geese.
Guest: No they aren’t! Look at their feathers they are all sick!
Me: You know how some people go through an awkward phase when they hit puberty? Well geese do the same thing. The feathers just look funny because they are switching from baby down to adult feathers.
Guest: Oh…you all should hide them when they are all ugly like that. *walks away*


*Bonus*
My coworker made my brain cry
CW: Okay so I have a question. Ducks are just like young geese, right?
Me:
Boss: No dear, ducks are ducks.

[superhotelworker]

Reponse to the guy who says hide them:

"Seriously. They bite and they're mean when you rile them up. I'm not bothering them."
and about the phone thing; We have a house phone they can use to call from the lobby to rooms, and I have at least 1 idiot a week, try to dial out on it.

[Julesy]

Geese scare me... I had a bit of an incident in my youth involving skating on a public pond and some cranky geese who thought I was invading their territory.
However, from a distance, I think those feather-changing-awkward-puberty-stage geese are super adorable.


Also, I think customers who think you are too cheerful, are just jealous. I come across that too, people who seem to be annoyed that I'm enjoying life.


Yes, ducks are just like baby geese. And after being geese for a while, they grow white feathers and become swans. Then they go through a very awkward stage again where they develop a very odd head, that's when you call them turkeys. After that, they change once again and get a lovely attire of royal blue feathers and an awesome tail: the peacock stage. The last stage in their life is when they become bright orange and red, that's when they are phoenixes. After a few years as a phoenix, they will spontaneously combust and out of the ashes, new baby ducks are born and the whole process starts over again. It's an amazing circle of fowl life.

[Sheldonrs]

"Guest: Oh…you all should hide them when they are all ugly like that. *walks away*"


Does that go for guests too?

[Lady J'ssem]

I kindda like geese, we have some that lives in our neighborhood mansion's pond (literally... right across the street from a rather rundown trailer home...). But I wouldn't go near them with a ten foot pole, or the safety of my car, with the windows up, do I don't get pecked.

My grandmother on my da's side used to have one big gander. I only saw him when I was 7 or so, (over three times that age now) he'd follow us kids around hissing and honking, trying to bite us cause he didn't like anyone going out in HIS yard. He'd only leave us alone if we got close to the house then he'd waddle back to his favorite sunny spot.

[boxxertrumps]

I guess I have to find the correct balance of pep.

> "#%$%^ #%% Boss this is %$% unacceptable!!!" >
*door opens*
WELCOME TO *WORKPLACE*!!! :

[BeeMused]

Yes, ducks are just like baby geese. And after being geese for a while, they grow white feathers and become swans. Then they go through a very awkward stage again where they develop a very odd head, that's when you call them turkeys. After that, they change once again and get a lovely attire of royal blue feathers and an awesome tail: the peacock stage. The last stage in their life is when they become bright orange and red, that's when they are phoenixes. After a few years as a phoenix, they will spontaneously combust and out of the ashes, new baby ducks are born and the whole process starts over again. It's an amazing circle of fowl life.

AAAAAARRRRGH you owe a new keyboard and monitor, oh and a new trackball too!
I'm sure though, that most guests will believe it, when Solumina tells them just that.

[LillFilly]

Ok, on the 'hide the ugly geese' and 'are ducks baby geese' we have NEW WINNERS IN EPIC LOGIC FAIL!

I loved the circle of life Sooo, what do finches become when they grow up?

My boyfriend had pet ducks; they slept in the dog house with the basset hound and waited for his schoolbus when he came home. Geese make good attack animals; I've heard some army bases have a fenced-in run around the perimeter with geese; they can sense someone coming from even further away than dogs! The bones in their wings make it feel like you got hammered by a club.

[RetailWorkhorse]

Sooo, what do finches become when they grow up?

Snarky little blonds that work for fashion magazines and try to hit on the models (Just Shoot Me).

[Hyena Dandy]

Snarky little blonds that work for fashion magazines and try to hit on the models (Just Shoot Me).

...You win, RW.

[RetailWorkhorse]

Did I win bacon?

[Peppergirl]

[Guest: Oh…you all should hide them when they are all ugly like that. *walks away*

Hide them where?

[Primer]

Did I win bacon?

No, I'm afraid all you get this time is chicken strips. Or whatever other bird is around here. Now when you can get the hedgehogs to be baby porcupines, which are really pork after all, then you can have bacon...

[RetailWorkhorse]

It's BACON er, CHICKEN STRIPS! *Noms* Mmph, needs more bacon grease.

[BookstoreEscapee]

Porkupine?