Please burst into flame now.

[guitardude1987]

As of today, I have exactly one week until sweet, sweet freedom comes to me in the form of unemployment.

I know you don't serve it...

Dear old asshole who ordered two egg sandwiches this morning,

We haven't served breakfast in over three years - the reason being that it was not profitable enough, so in order to cut costs and remain open for business, we stopped breakfast. Yes, I do see the irony of the situation, what with seeing how the restaurant is shutting the doors December 31st, but that's beside the point. The point is that you cannot have the egg sandwiches. Also, after I pointed out the "no breakfast" situation, you replied "oh, I know you guys don't serve breakfast anymore." My only response to that is : "you go to hell. You go to hell and you die."

Sincerely,

Guitardude1987

You're quite needy.

A trio of retards entered the restaurant and proceeded to take ten minutes to place their orders because of the "editing" they needed to do.

Retard #1 couldn't have her side vegetables served on the same plate as her steak because she didn't like to "mix flavors".

Retard #2 couldn't have his sweet tea too sweet because he didn't want his teeth to rot. I resisted pointing out the fact that most of his teeth were decaying from his constant meth consumption. He also did not want his chicken strips too large or too small - but "in the middle."

Retard #3 asked if there was any way we could mash up his chicken fried steak so that he could eat it without having to put in dentures. In order to force him to equip his dentures, I told him that we had nothing with which to "mash up" the steak.

Retard #1 needed three separate forks/spoons with which to eat her food because she didn't want the residue of the corn to mingle with her steak or her green beans. "Mixing flavors is disgusting." I wanted to point out that she was mixing three different flavors by having grilled onions and brown gravy topping her steak, but thought better of it.

[ralerin]

Person# 1 sounds a bit OCD. Isn't there some form of that that forces people to separate their food and eat off 5 different forks and spoons?

[SeasonalSlave]

Person #1 is almost certainly OCD. I have a very, very mild case of it and I can't stand to eat food that has a flavor seeped in that I don't like (for example, I can't just "pick the pepperonis off a pizza" because the pepperoni flavor has still seeped into the rest of the pizza). However, I don't find mixing ALL flavors disgusting.

Not to mention flavor really only "mixes" with food next to each other if they've been cooked together/are greasy/have juices that can seep into other food. Depending on the vegetables, the flavor's not going to seep into her steak. Tomatoes might, lettuce wouldn't, for instance.

[EvilEmpryss]

Maybe R#1 was keeping kosher?

*Ducks and runs.

[vikingchyk]

Retard #1 needed three separate forks/spoons with which to eat her food because she didn't want the residue of the corn to mingle with her steak or her green beans. "Mixing flavors is disgusting." I wanted to point out that she was mixing three different flavors by having grilled onions and brown gravy topping her steak, but thought better of it.

A girl in my office is always apologizing because she doesn't like her foods touching (at a recent office pot luck, she got three plates so she could maintain enough space between the items (no, not one item per plate, she's not that particular)) I'll have to mention this to her, so maybe she won't feel so bad about being a little OCD about her food Hopefully it won't give her any ideas

[Andara Bledin]

Retard #1 needed three separate forks/spoons with which to eat her food because she didn't want the residue of the corn to mingle with her steak or her green beans.

I wouldn't have been able to resist. I'd have told her that there would be corn residue left in her mouth until she gargled with mouthwash, so the changing forks would be a futile gesture.

I have a very, very mild case of it and I can't stand to eat food that has a flavor seeped in that I don't like (for example, I can't just "pick the pepperonis off a pizza" because the pepperoni flavor has still seeped into the rest of the pizza).

This has nothing to do with OCD. Because you don't like a flavor, you are more sensitive to it, so it makes sense that you don't want anything with that flavor having gotten it onto your food. My middle aunt can spot a dash of white pepper in a gallon of stew.

^-.-^

[Food Lady]

The thread title is making me giggle for some reason.

[chainedbarista]

i can understand the mixing of flavors somewhat (i despise bell peppers and can taste them almost anywhere), but that's asinine. flavors mix no matter what; she's just stupid and wants special treatment.

meth head needs meth, fetch boy.

stop being a lazy bastard; equip your damn dentures or stay home. unless, he wants a meat milkshake...yum.

the very first guy is just being an asshole, like you said. if you know it's not served, don't ask for it; really, it's not funny.

[Frantic Freddie]

"Retard #3 asked if there was any way we could mash up his chicken fried steak so that he could eat it without having to put in dentures. In order to force him to equip his dentures, I told him that we had nothing with which to "mash up" the steak."

WTF,does he carry 'em around in his pocket??? I won't be seen in public without mine.

[Can I Help Your A$$?]

Monk comes to eat at your restaurant, I see.

[MoonCat]

"mixing flavors is disgusting"

What does she think happens in cooking?

[figures]

Person #1 is almost certainly OCD.

Actually..

It means he's a Klingon!!

[aurelemsrealm]

I also like the title of this thread. I often wish sucktomers would burst into flames.

Today's menu: Take what you get or do without!

[TheTigress]

These people sound like a lot of my Subway customers. *shudders*

[Imprl59]

#1 could have been me. I can't stand for my food to touch and I generally eat one thing at a time. The very worst is the barrell of crackers on Friday night where they get green bean juice on the fried fish. Not at my table you dont!