Please burst into flame now.

[Dreamstalker]

Monk comes to eat at your restaurant, I see.

So I´ḿ not the only one who thought of that...

One of the quirks I´m ¨supposed to" have is separating food (textures).* For a while my mom actually cooked for a family whose daughter did that. The mother was amazed that mom knew what was going on (apparently their previous cook had no clue and would yell at the poor kid to ¨stop playing around" ) and could simply go with it.

* Not only do I not separate food, I try combos that have gotten me some odd looks.

[ShadowBall]

My cousin used to be like Retard 1 - she had to eat each different food on her plate with a different utensil. She outgrew it, though. I would have a very hard time resisting telling people who do this that all their food is going to touch and mix in their stomach anyway, so WTF difference does it make if they don't mix on the way in?

And I especially love the people who say they can't mix flavors, but will sit there eating a sundae with all the fixins, a pizza with multiple toppings or ANY kind of blended drink.

And I've tried some funky food combos myself, Dreamstalker. Everyone I know still thinks I'm insane because I like cream cheese on chicken-flavored ramen. Then again, I can eat cream cheese right out of the container.

[Setsunaela]

Everyone I know still thinks I'm insane because I like cream cheese on chicken-flavored ramen. Then again, I can eat cream cheese right out of the container.

I'll have to try that one.. I'm known for my odd add-ins to ramen.. and I can eat cream cheese from the container as well. I also add cream cheese to my spaghetti sauce.. >.>

[Naaman]

Retard #3 asked if there was any way we could mash up his chicken fried steak so that he could eat it without having to put in dentures. In order to force him to equip his dentures, I told him that we had nothing with which to "mash up" the steak.

You need one of these

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KK4LTvkGcSs

[Ben_Who]

These people sound like a lot of my Subway customers. *shudders*

"Okay, I want a bacon, lettuce, and tomato six-inch sub - but I want the bacon, the lettuce, and the tomato on separate six-inch lengths of bread."

Oh, God, as I was typing that, I had a feeling that someone would try to get away with that at some point...

Love, Who?

[Kristev]

I'm a bit like # 1 myself. However, the tendency to write things down before I order them helps dispel a lot of the confusion, and wasted time.