still haunts me

[XCashier]

I would have put a size 11 shoe in a size 9 box.

That's assuming that Mommie Dearest wouldn't have looked at the markings in the shoes and seen what size they actually were.

I think we've all done (or not done) things in the past that we now regret. Please try not to beat yourself up over this. You were young and unsure of yourself. You can't change the past; you can only change how you react in the present and future.

Agreed 100%. You did the best you could in a situation you could not have foreseen. Learn from it, forgive yourself, and let it go.

[RootedPhoenix]

*hugs NoLongerAShoeDog* It's not something you could have fixed. The fact that you want to is enough to say that you don't endorse such actions. Forgive yourself. Even if you could have acted differently then, you cannot change the past by berating yourself now.

[Merriweather]

Most likely, the mother was one of those parents who view their children not as people but simply as one more "accomplishment" of theirs, to show off - and therefore, those children have to be (or have the appearence of being) perfect. And small hands and feet have always been considered to be more "feminine", and therefore desirable in a daughter.

Sure, my initial reaction was it would have been great for you (or a manager) to insist that the store was a full-service store and experts at fitting, and would not knowingly sell mis-fitting shoes. Or call the mother on it and say "madam, these shoes will cause your daughter great pain, do you want her to be in pain?" But figure the odds on a manager agreeing to do that. And even if it had been done, she'd only have gone to another store to get them. And possibly taken it out on the child later in some way.

I would try not to feel bad about how you handled it, as you simply don't know if acting differently might have made things much worse on the child once they left, and would almost certainly have made no real difference to the good at all.

I can only hope that injured feet were the worst of her physical abuse, but I very much feel the emotional abuse was much worse, and can leave worse scars.

I can totally understand why this would haunt you for so long, but do try not to blame yourself, this is definitely one of those cases where trying to help might have done more harm than doing nothing.

[Moosenogger]

It may have been a bit diabolic, but I'm curious if the mother would have noticed if you'd brought a size 11 from the back, anyway. You could always switch the boxes around so it said size 9, but was actually an 11.

[wolfie]

To put the shoe on the other foot:

Mother goes into a jewelry store, shopping for necklaces. Clerk measures her, finds she takes a 13.5". Gets an 8" (heavy chain, in stainless steel) out of the case, and helps mother put it on.

[Ironclad Alibi]

The reason that mother was so mean is she's been wearing shoes two sizes too small all of her life. And if she can do it, so can her daughter.

[Argus]

The reason that mother was so mean is she's been wearing shoes two sizes too small all of her life.

To go with her heart?