Classroom Antics

[Miss Fatale]

BG I teach writing to college freshmen. I generally teach adults (late 20s and up), but this particular class skews pretty young: 19-20-21. /BG

How do grades work?

After handing back some homework, a student grumbled, "I only got a low grade because I didn't do part of the assignment."

What did I just say?

Discussing the requirements for their final paper, I reminded my students, "For this project, you do not have to cite the textbook. You do not have to use outside sources. But if you do use outside sources, you must cite them."

A student raised a hand and asked, "So we have to cite outside sources?"

I nodded. "Yes." (Maybe they're finally getting it!)

"So, if we use the textbook, we have to cite it?"

Deep breath. "No, as I just explained. . . ."

Sidenote: Generally, you should cite the textbook, but for various reasons, they do not need to for this project.

Testing, Testing, 123

Further, I was explaining the thesis statement, one of the most important parts of college writing.

"A thesis statement," I explained, "is a single declarative sentence. It sums up the main point of your paper. Declarative means it states something, as in the sentence 'I like cookies.' It is the answer to a question. It cannot be a question such as, 'How do I feel about cookies?' Let's look at some examples. . ."

Student (different than before) raised hand and asked, "Can we include a question in our thesis statement?"

Very deep internal sigh "No, as I just explained, it cannot be a question. You can include rhetorical questions elsewhere in the paper but not in the thesis statement."


No, really, is this thing on?

There is a short list of "banned" topics. I've written before about how students feel this infringes upon their First Amendment rights.

That didn't happen this time, but inevitably, several students submitted topics that were on the banned list. And I don't mean in a "sorta kinda" way, I mean in a "Writing about gun control is banned" "My topic is gun control" way.

Mom Voice

Recently we had a work day in the computer lab. It was just us in the lab (about 15 total). I usually let them chat quietly as they work.

For whatever reason (well, because of the upcoming holidays, I'm sure), they were being particularly rowdy and loud. Someone started playing a YouTube video at normal volume.

Finally, I yelled, "Everyone needs to quiet down. People are working. And if you aren't working, I'll give you more to do."

Blessed silence for the next 5 minutes.


I wasn't born yesterday

I normally get to my classroom about 5 minutes early, and usually a few students are already there. However, I arrived just one or two minutes early to my most recent class, the last before the holiday break (the holidays fall during the middle of this term, so we'll be returning in January). I was surprised to see the lights were out in the room, but who knows, maybe everyone was still eating holiday treats in the cafeteria.

I flipped on the lights and to my surprise, they were all sitting there.

"Well, we thought you'd see the lights were off and leave. Then we could all go home early," they explained.

"I'd talk to an empty room," I replied. I mean, that is why I got into teaching, I love to hear myself talk. And teaching to an empty room sounds pretty nice. . . .

[PepperElf]

Sidenote: Generally, you should cite the textbook, but for various reasons, they do not need to for this project.

I'm sensing that one of those reasons is the fact that they keep asking stupid questions?

[Fudgethatkay]

I flipped on the lights and to my surprise, they were all sitting there.

"Well, we thought you'd see the lights were off and leave. Then we could all go home early," they explained.

"

The....stupidity of this...

Their lack of logic.../headdesk

[mhkohne]

How do grades work?

After handing back some homework, a student grumbled, "I only got a low grade because I didn't do part of the assignment."

Well, on the plus side, this one clearly IS getting the connection between work done and grades. On the downside, this one clearly doesn't get WHY that connection exists. There might be hope. But probably not.

No, really, is this thing on?

There is a short list of "banned" topics. I've written before about how students feel this infringes upon their First Amendment rights.

That didn't happen this time, but inevitably, several students submitted topics that were on the banned list. And I don't mean in a "sorta kinda" way, I mean in a "Writing about gun control is banned" "My topic is gun control" way.

Oh man. I can easily see why you would want to avoid hot-button political topics. The nature of the topic is going to overwealm the proper discussion of the writing. Why can't they just read the instructions?

I wasn't born yesterday

I normally get to my classroom about 5 minutes early, and usually a few students are already there. However, I arrived just one or two minutes early to my most recent class, the last before the holiday break (the holidays fall during the middle of this term, so we'll be returning in January). I was surprised to see the lights were out in the room, but who knows, maybe everyone was still eating holiday treats in the cafeteria.

I flipped on the lights and to my surprise, they were all sitting there.

"Well, we thought you'd see the lights were off and leave. Then we could all go home early," they explained.

"I'd talk to an empty room," I replied. I mean, that is why I got into teaching, I love to hear myself talk. And teaching to an empty room sounds pretty nice. . . .

I...I...really? They thought that was worth trying? No teacher in any universe is going to wander off just because the lights are out. I'm sorry your class is so thick...

[TonyDonuts]

"I...I...really? They thought that was worth trying?"

Never, never, underestimate the amount of work and mental effort people will put into being lazy.

The kids probably spent weeks plotting that.

[Kanalah]

I read the last part out loud to my hubs, and asked him to guess what grade level the OP teaches.

He said 2nd grade.

[lordlundar]

I wasn't born yesterday

I normally get to my classroom about 5 minutes early, and usually a few students are already there. However, I arrived just one or two minutes early to my most recent class, the last before the holiday break (the holidays fall during the middle of this term, so we'll be returning in January). I was surprised to see the lights were out in the room, but who knows, maybe everyone was still eating holiday treats in the cafeteria.

I flipped on the lights and to my surprise, they were all sitting there.

"Well, we thought you'd see the lights were off and leave. Then we could all go home early," they explained.

"I'd talk to an empty room," I replied. I mean, that is why I got into teaching, I love to hear myself talk. And teaching to an empty room sounds pretty nice. . . .

<raises hand> guilty.

In my defense, this was in elementary school (aka grads K-6) so it was a viable idea at the time.

[Merriweather]

I read the last part out loud to my hubs, and asked him to guess what grade level the OP teaches.

He said 2nd grade.

I just did the same to my hubby. He guessed collage. I told him the above, and he said, well, he figured 2nd graders would know it wouldn't work, they hadn't had original sense lost over the years

[Pixilated]

*snip*

Oh man. I can easily see why you would want to avoid hot-button political topics. The nature of the topic is going to overwealm the proper discussion of the writing. Why can't they just read the instructions?

*snip*

I don't think it's limited to only the young, but I can tell you many hardly ever do. Years ago I was taking a German history course and the teacher handed out the general class outline -- can't remember what the official name is just ATM. One of the points on it was that if you handed a paper in late without a valid reason (e.g. something in writing) your paper would not be accepted.

One paper was due Monday or Tuesday. The Friday before that we were sitting in the classroom when one of the students commented, "Wonder what he'll do when I hand my paper in next Friday."

Another older student and I looked at each other.

Me: "Um, he won't accept it."

Late student: "WHAT? WHY NOT????"

Me: "Check the class outline that he handed out on the first day. Unless you have a valid reason, he will NOT accept late assignments."

LS:

Other older student and I:

Also, I'm not sure where you're located, but I'm told that here in Canada teachers are not allowed to refuse to accept late assignments, no matter how late they are (perhaps someone more familiar with the Canadian school system can verify or debunk this?) So then they get into college or university and discover that deadlines there are not optional. And many find it out the hard way.

[shopgirl15]

I flipped on the lights and to my surprise, they were all sitting there.

"Well, we thought you'd see the lights were off and leave. Then we could all go home early," they explained.

"I'd talk to an empty room," I replied. I mean, that is why I got into teaching, I love to hear myself talk. And teaching to an empty room sounds pretty nice. . . .

We did something similar in college, but meant it as a joke. If the professor had left we'd have laughed and chased after him.

[shopgirl15]

There is a short list of "banned" topics. I've written before about how students feel this infringes upon their First Amendment rights.

That didn't happen this time, but inevitably, several students submitted topics that were on the banned list. And I don't mean in a "sorta kinda" way, I mean in a "Writing about gun control is banned" "My topic is gun control" way.

Do you mean they wrote the papers or this is just submitting the topic idea?

[Miss Fatale]

Do you mean they wrote the papers or this is just submitting the topic idea?

In this particular instance, it was just submitting a topic, so luckily I could step in and say, "No, pick a new topic."

Unfortunately, in a previous class, where students were not required to submit their paper topics, someone did turn in a paper on a banned topic. I hate that. It's not like I enjoy giving out bad grades, especially for such a silly reason.

[Merriweather]

Why can't they just read the instructions?

I may have mentioned this in a thread long ago (and far far away?). I had a high school teacher who decided to make a lasting impression on his class about reading instructions.

He handed out a paper, told us to be very careful to read and follow directions exactly as written, and he'd explain afterwards why.

First thing on the paper was "read over every item to the end of the paper before beginning to actually do any of the items".

Last thing on the paper was "now that you've read all of the items on this paper, simply put your name on the top of the paper, and sit quietly - do not actually DO any of the items".

In between were random things, from complicated math problem, to standing up and walking round your desk, reciting out loud, etc.

Those few of us who actually had followed the directions had quite a floor show.

And at the end of the class the teacher simply asked all those sitting there looking decidedly red-faced & self-conscious, "now, will any of you fail to read the instructions given you in the future:". and sat down.

[fireheart]

I had a high school teacher who decided to make a lasting impression on his class about reading instructions.

<snippage>

oh my god I'm laughing so hard I nearly peed myself!

[Miss Maple Leaf]

I may have mentioned this in a thread long ago (and far far away?). I had a high school teacher who decided to make a lasting impression on his class about reading instructions.

I remember my teacher giving us that test in Grade 6. Very few kids passed.

(And yes, I was one of the ones who passed.)

And just to rub it in, the fact that we were given the test, and the fact that most failed (though it didn't mention any names) made it into the yearbook.