Day 4: (With Audio Bonus...)

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Somehow I don't think Gravekeeper is qualified to offer the kind of help that dry pool diving team member needs.

"Anything I can help you with? Nothing?"

[DGoddessChardonnay]

I'm surprised you don't have your own radio show by now, Gravekeeper. You get the creme de la creme of stupid, don't you?

[BusBus]

Hey BusBus, your not alone in a way, except he does't sound like an ex of mine. he sound likea friend i used to hang out with awhile back. they both have the same sense of humor and relaxed attitude, but i think they are two seperate people. i miss my friend...welost touch for some reason.

I guess Gravekeeper has a 'generic' voice

[Kilamon]

I don't know. I thought Gravekeeper was Canadian and I didn't hear a single "eh" in there....

Seriously though... Whiskey Tango Foxtrot? People call up late night to random people and just spout that? I guess there are people let out of their padded rooms at night or something cause that's just weird.

(everything I learned about Canada is from the McKenzie brothers )

[Jester]

I'm surprised you don't have your own radio show by now, Gravekeeper. You get the creme de la creme of stupid, don't you?

I disagree, and was commenting on this just the other day.

While GK does get his share of loonies, I really don't think his are any worse than most of ours. As a matter of fact, I would say that the vast majority of his are normal run of the mill stupid people that we get every day.

The DIFFERENCE is that GK's storytelling and writing abilities are so completely and ridiculously off the scale* that the stories are just that much better, and the idiots look that much stupider. He doesn't get the creme de la crem of stupid, he just gets stupid. The way he TELLS you about them is the creme de la creme, my friends.


*Yes, I am jealous. Yes, I hate you Gravekeeper. And there is nothing you can say to make me change my mind. But why yes. Yes you CAN (silently) get me a cold beer. That would sure as hell help. :-)

[Ljt09863]

*Yes, I am jealous. Yes, I hate you Gravekeeper. And there is nothing you can say to make me change my mind. :-)

don't worry Gravekeeper. i love you. we just have to keep it low key cause my fiancee might not like it.....

[Gravekeeper]

Haha, time and beer heals all wounds, does it?

[Ackee]

Classic

I love the bright way you said "and good morning to you too."

I am still trying to figure out why he would call to do that. How is it possible people can be so ignorant and stupid?

[Kara]

While GK does get his share of loonies, I really don't think his are any worse than most of ours. As a matter of fact, I would say that the vast majority of his are normal run of the mill stupid people that we get every day.

The other difference is exposure. When I worked in retail, the only customers I connected with were the one I approached and offered to help or who came through my lines. Circuit City, I'd say I probably had 15 customers a day. The exposure rate at Kroger was different. When I was at the front end, probably 30-40 customers on busy days. In Grocery, where I could hide in the back room or the dairy cooler, maybe I had 10 customers a day. Video was probably 25 a day.

Now, I don't know the specifics of Gravekeeper's job (or the jobs of other call center folks in here), but I'm in a call center for a company serving 27 million customers, things are different. I'm efficient, so my calls average 5-7 minutes in length. On an average day, when we aren't getting back-to-back calls, I take about 70 calls a day. My probability for getting a 'tard in my ear is very high. So I usually get at least 5 good stories a day to share in here (more, now that I've started taking notes).

Sarcasm comes with the territory. Our company values courtesy above all else, so I have to be all sweet and nice and offer everyone a kitten. Here I can voice the dark rantings I wish I could've gotten away with saying directly to the customer.

GK is just so dang good at it

[BookstoreEscapee]

Hats! NO! No more hats! They really take that whole losing body heat through the head thing seriously up there, don't they?

GK-Keep the audio clips coming! I'm developing a crush on your voice

j/k...maybe...

[Gravekeeper]

I love the bright way you said "and good morning to you too."

I am still trying to figure out why he would call to do that. How is it possible people can be so ignorant and stupid?

That call came off of one of our emergency lines for the Canadian branch office of a US government agency. We have two of them, one is...."diplomatic" in nature the other is rather surprising (You wouldn't think they had an office in Canada...).

Whenever some nutcase or jackass in the middle of the night decides he's going to give the Americans a piece of his mind he calls one of these emergency lines and rants at us. Most of them are regulars too. They call once every week or two in order to go off on us like that. They don't even realise they're talking to another Canadian. =p ( I've tried pointing it out but that got me called several variations of homosexual for 3 minutes ).

Its a really, REALLY bad idea too on a side note. Because the US government is....well, you know. ;p If any caller, regardless of how crazy, drunk, whatever they sound makes ANY sort of threat against the US, its properties, resources, citizens or one of its leaders I have to call up the calvary and send them after the guy.

So its actually fantastically stupid of them on several levels.

[Ackee]

Oh dear

Maybe its a new kind of sport to them....

[AFpheonix]

Ha ha ha haha!

You could hear that guy's brain break when you answered him! Priceless!

[morgana]

GK, I love you! (And I don't have a fiance I have to about)

Your delivery just *makes* that clip. My co-workers can't figure out why I'm laughing fit to choke to death.


Morgana

[Broomjockey]

The way he TELLS you about them is the creme de la creme, my friends.

I agree completely. It's really the comments that make the story that special kind of funny.
I think eventually, we should get a compilation of all of GK's posts, and put them in the literary section or something like that!