The Best of "Subway Rants" (long)

[Pairou]

Mmm cookies~

I love soccer moms. I love the strange sound they make in grocery stores when the poor cashier is trying to tell them that no, she can't take that coupon, it's for a different store.

[TheTigress]

*brings in a big tray of cookies of various kinds for everyone*

Glad you enjoyed it, and you all seem to really be on the ball with the stuff you want on your sandwiches. If only every customer was like that. The would would sure be a much happier place.

Update on the locking door thing. They can lock from the inside now. When I wrote that part of the rant we still had our old door locks which couldn't.

That's all as far as my saved rants goes, but I still have a stock pile of customer horror stories that I can post later.

[JoitheArtist]

Ok, I'll admit it, I was a sucky Subway customer the other day, but only by accident! My credit card was declined, and I had to have them hang on to my sandwich until I could get some cash (about 20 minutes). But they were really nice about it, and I was suitably mortified to have caused a problem.

I really like Subway sandwiches; I can't remember ever having a problem with one I ordered myself. I do try to watch as the sandwich is built to make sure it's right, and the sandwich makers have been really good at it 9 times out of 10.

Can I have a cookie too?

[smoorman76]

I worked at Subway for three and a half years, and all I can say is ... yep, yep, yep. All that and then some. Except for the cards. I left before that.

[Nyx]

I feel your pain. A few of my favorites from subway were, the guy who ordered a "six inch footlong" and the woman who kept telling me as I made her sandwich that she wanted a cookie. I told her that she needed to tell the cashier that, but she kept telling me. " Lather, rinse, repeat", she goes to pay and I help the next customer and carry on. She comes back a few minutes later and begins screaming about her cookie. Guess I should have known better than to get between a large woman and her cookie.

[powerboy]

I usually order the Cold Cut Trio(Classic Cold Cut) on a 12 inch wheat bread. Half the time, I will want it warm.

[TheTigress]

Guess I should have known better than to get between a large woman and her cookie.

HAHAHAHAHAHA! That made me laugh in real life!

*brings in another tray of various cookie types for everyone else who replied*

[TheTigress]

Ok, I'll admit it, I was a sucky Subway customer the other day, but only by accident! My credit card was declined, and I had to have them hang on to my sandwich until I could get some cash (about 20 minutes). But they were really nice about it, and I was suitably mortified to have caused a problem.

I really like Subway sandwiches; I can't remember ever having a problem with one I ordered myself. I do try to watch as the sandwich is built to make sure it's right, and the sandwich makers have been really good at it 9 times out of 10.

Can I have a cookie too?

That doesn't really seem that sucky at all. I know a few customers have done that at our store but we have no problems holding the sandwich for them until they come back with their card.

And yes, you can most definitely have a cookie. :P

[JoitheArtist]

That doesn't really seem that sucky at all. I know a few customers have done that at our store but we have no problems holding the sandwich for them until they come back with their card.

And yes, you can most definitely have a cookie. :P

Yay, cookie! And my compliments to Subway for the $5 footlong promotion. I'm sure it's not easy on ya'll (customers who don't read which sandwiches it applies to, etc), but it's a great deal on a sub.

Dang. Now I want a sub.

[Anriana]

Given the SubWays I've been to, there's no way I'm calling in an order. Management hires some of the worst and most mindless drones.

I always, always, always order the same thing. Footlong steak-and-cheese on white ... lettuce and mayo only. Now, I don't expect anyone to remember this. They see hundreds of folks a day.

But, I would often have to stand there and nearly CHANT "lettuce and mayo ONLY".

Them: What can I get for you today?
Me: Footlong steak-and-cheese on white.
Them: (meat's in the microwave now) Do you want cheese with that?
Me: (wondering what "-and-cheese" means) Yes, the standard white cheese, please.
Them: OK. What do you want on it?
Me: Lettuce and mayo only.
Them: (Putting on lettuce) Do you want mustard or mayo?
Me: Lettuce and mayo only, please.
Them: Jalapenos, olices, peppers, anything else?
Me: Lettuce and mayo only, please.
Them: Vinegar, salt, pepper?
Me: Lettuce and mayo only, please.

Rinse, repeat.

If I wanted a garden salad on a bun, I'd order it that way. AGH!

Having worked at an assembly line restaurant (Moe's), I've done that many times. 95% of customers won't tell you what they want so you get in the habit of doing things by rote. And I very rarely cared enough put my full mental effort into that job when I worked there.

[marasbaras]

Having worked at an assembly line restaurant (Moe's), I've done that many times. 95% of customers won't tell you what they want so you get in the habit of doing things by rote. And I very rarely cared enough put my full mental effort into that job when I worked there.

I certainly understand why. Although, the kids in the SubWays near my old house were of particularly low genetic quality.

Sad that the 5% of us who can communicate our desires clearly and accurately have to suffer for the 95% who cannot.

[Eben56]

"I'll have an *Italian*"
- Let me explain this one for a second, and I assure you after you know the details of this problem you will agree in an instant that this deserves top spot on any Subway Rants list. The problem with this sentence is that we have *various* things in our store that equals "an Italian." First of all, we have a bread choice that is an Italian, and THEN, we have two different types of "Italian" sandwiches. The Italian BMT and then the Spicy Italian. I really really dislike it when people say they want an "Italian" because they could mean any of these several things I just listed. And then God help us if we choose the wrong one.

I might have a tiny bit of empathy for the customer on this one. Its a regional thing but in Maine I can walk into any store and ask for an "Italian". They will know exactly what I want. The most complicated question they would ask might be "ham or salami"

Italian = white sub roll, salami, cheese, onions, green peppers, olives, and a squirt of oil.

[ShinyGreenApple]

Yikes. And to think, we went to Subway last Friday and my Dad casually pointed at the window and said "Look, LB, they're hiring!"

You mad that we don't have Swiss cheese or mushrooms on the menu? Get over it.

People want mushrooms? At Subway? Really?

Never heard that one before. Oh well. *accepts cookie*

[DeeSandwichArtist]

Don't you hate it when you're serving a bus of 30 kids and 4 other buses decide that it would be a good time to come in and then they get pissy when you run out of Monterey Cheddar or Herbs and Cheese.

[clowninasack]

Ah, subway. Sometimes I feel like I'm the only one who is coherent when they come in there. I always end up saying at the beginning:

SA: Sandwich artist

Me: "Footlong Cold Cut Combo on Italian"
SA: "Italian herb & Cheese?"

I always say "just Italian". I'm sure they get alot of people who just say "Italian" when they mean the one with herb & cheese. Makes me for the employees sometimes.