The Best of "Subway Rants" (long)

[depechemodefan]

I have ordered the Chicken Bacon Ranch, and they always ask me if I want Ranch on it. How can you call it Chicken Bacon Ranch without the Ranch?

Probably happened a lot of times the Subway artist makes the thing, then the customer says, "you know, I really don't want ranch, can you put (italian, mayo, etc)?

I havn't been in Subway in a long time. The one near my work has non-english speakers who make the sandwiches. A few times I get something that isn't what I want.

[FenigDurak]

Not answering my "do you want mayo or mustard?" question and immediately telling me what veggies you want instead.
-There is a fucking reason why we ask you if you want mayo or mustard. This does not mean to just not answer the question if you do not want it. It makes me think you didn't hear me so I will ask it again. It's a very simple concept but apparently there are people out there who are lacking greatly in common sense. After me asking you "do you want mayo or mustard", a simple no would suffice if you don't want any, and THEN tell me what veggies you want. Not the "let's just not say anything if I don't want it" game. It's also very annoying that on top of one not answering me, they tell me "I wanted mayo and mustard on that" when I'm done with their veggies and sometimes I have to re open their damn sandwich(s) again because they FAILED to tell me when I initially asked them.

I'm somewhat guilty of this. I tend to ask if I can have the mustard on top of the veggies since I typically get my sandwich and then put it aside until I get hungry. Keeps the mustard from soaking the bread. Same with the tomatoes.

[Fiyero]

I love Subway, and the staff that work there. They are doing a promotion for the sub of the day for £1.99 for a six inch (been doing it for ages actually). That is cheaper than just the veggie delite which is what I normally have so I have been getting a lot of subs of the day. The guy was cool when I wanted a turkey and ham without ham, even gave me extra turkey.
They always seem a little surprised that I don't want cheese or toasting, I guess those are popular options.

btw I miss the stamps, we never got the subway card scheme to replace it.

[Difdi]

I feel your pain. A few of my favorites from subway were, the guy who ordered a "six inch footlong" and the woman who kept telling me as I made her sandwich that she wanted a cookie. I told her that she needed to tell the cashier that, but she kept telling me. " Lather, rinse, repeat", she goes to pay and I help the next customer and carry on. She comes back a few minutes later and begins screaming about her cookie. Guess I should have known better than to get between a large woman and her cookie.

You should have taken out a cookie, broken it up, added it to the sandwich, and acted confused why she might object...

[icmedia]

A cookie and a hug for anyone who reads through all of it.

Toll House, please, and extra snug hug. Thanks, a "fucketload," to borrow my new favorite term.

[Chevy Nachos]

Tigress, I thought of you today.

I was in line at Subway behind a guy who bought a footlong Philly cheesesteak then got upset when it was more than five dollars.

SC: "Huh? I thought footlongs were five dollars?"
Cashier: "No, cheesesteaks aren't on the special."
SC: "Well thanks for telling me after I stood here and watched you make it!"

Of course, he could have used that time to read the big Philly cheesesteak sign that said that that item isn't available for five dollars. At least he paid for the sandwich instead of storming out.

[Arm]

Maybe the customers wanting an italian are merely stuck in a time warp?

When I was a kid, Subway used to sell an italian sub. They may have called it a spicy italian. Not 100% sure. I think it was just an italian, though.

The tiger in a tutu comment really rings true. It's kinda funny. I can only imagine that the original italian wasn't a great seller, because it got dropped from the menu. But over the years they've added a few clones, and steadily decreased the actual content of the sandwich. Makes me wonder if, oh, random-sandwich-22 can really match the numbers of an item that was one of maybe 9 or 10 that they used to stock

meh. I never go to Subway when there's a Jersey Mike's in the same geographic region. I got tired of watching the sandwich assembly-person try to stretch those one or two lonely bits of meat to try to cover the bread

[TheTigress]

I always say "just Italian". I'm sure they get alot of people who just say "Italian" when they mean the one with herb & cheese. Makes me for the employees sometimes.

Oh God, yes! That happens all the time! I forgot to add that to my rants, actually. Then they have the nerve to get all pissy when you tell them that they said "Italian."

[TheTigress]

Tigress, I thought of you today.

I was in line at Subway behind a guy who bought a footlong Philly cheesesteak then got upset when it was more than five dollars.

SC: "Huh? I thought footlongs were five dollars?"
Cashier: "No, cheesesteaks aren't on the special."
SC: "Well thanks for telling me after I stood here and watched you make it!"

Of course, he could have used that time to read the big Philly cheesesteak sign that said that that item isn't available for five dollars. At least he paid for the sandwich instead of storming out.

Oh yeah, we've had a few of those at our Subway too. Which is why whenever someone says they want one of the non-5 dollar footlongs, I always make sure to let them know at the start that those don't qualify for the special. Most of them are like "It doesn't! OMG let me get something else then!"

Sometimes I think people choose not to read up on things like that on purpose to see if they can get away with a fast one. Sort of like selective reading.

[Plaidman]

Oh god almighty I love subway. Like alot. LIKE ALOT. I could eat it all the damn time. Roasted Chicken breast, (Bread changes) Pepperjack, all veggies cept tomato and pickles, (Yes, even peppers) mayo, chipote sauce, salt/pepper oil vinger, and I'm good to go with bbq chips and cherry coke.

On the otherside, they always ask about mayo/mustard at the end of sandwhich making.

[jerkface11]

All I want is a foot long meatball with extra cheese, black olives, and salami on the italian bread. I'd also like to have my cookie.

[Eric the Grey]

A cookie and a hug for anyone who reads through all of it.

WHAT???!?!!!!ONEoneone! What are you trying to do, kill me? I can't eat that!

I certainly understand why. Although, the kids in the SubWays near my old house were of particularly low genetic quality.

Sad that the 5% of us who can communicate our desires clearly and accurately have to suffer for the 95% who cannot.

I don't do Subway very often any more because there aren't many around during my regular commute. Usually I stop at Quiznos. However, they tend to have the same lack of intelligence in their "sandwich artists."

I usually order a sandwich with "Everything except onions and hot peppers." This seems reasonable and understandable to me. Of course, some people don't get it:

SA: Do you want jalapeños on that?
Me: No, that would be a hot pepper...
SA: Ok, how about banana peppers?
Me: *Resists the urge to pound his head on the counter* NO! (I absolutely hate those things)

I have ordered the Chicken Bacon Ranch, and they always ask me if I want Ranch on it. How can you call it Chicken Bacon Ranch without the Ranch?

SC

Well, Quiznos has a Black and Bleu salad that I order without bleu cheese, so I suppose that's not too hard to understand.

*wanders off eating his cookie* /someotherthread

Eric the Grey

[TheTigress]

Toll House, please, and extra snug hug. Thanks, a "fucketload," to borrow my new favorite term.

*uber sized hug for spreading the term "fucketload" around*

Oh yeah, here's a giant tub of Toll House cookies.

[TheTigress]

Oh yeah, another really annoying thing is when I'm making sandwiches for people who are together and the people start moving around so they are no longer in front of their respective sandwiches. That greatly heightens the chance of me putting stuff on the wrong sandwich because the people switched around.

[RedRoseSpiral]

I feel bad. Last night my group was sucky because of my friend's mom. I got my order done in about a minute. They on the other hand took a good 10 minutes to get two 12 inch subs and a kiddie sub because my friend's mother wouldn't listen and got bitchy when we were told they closed in 5 minutes. I left the one cute guy with the tattoos the web address for this place.