Stupid Warning Labels

[Seanette]

How did someone manage that one???I mean what were they thinking . . . . . .well nevermind cause . . DUH . . .they never think!!
But seriously how did that happen??

Cats have been known to put themselves in laundry appliances. Had that happen with a cat of ours when I was little (I do not directly remember this event. The version following is my mother's recollection).

My mother had put a load of clothes in the washer, then had to answer the phone in a different part of the house (this was early 70s, before answering machines were common in ordinary homes). She returned to the laundry, closed the washer lid, started it, and heard a loud MEEEEEOOOOOOWWWWWW!!!!!!!! She stopped the machine in a hurry, opened it, and out shot a wet, angry cat who'd climbed in while she was away. The cat was fine, and lived many years after that incident, as the reigning monarch of the household, bossing humans, dogs, and other cats.

[Seanette]

so what do you use to bleach hair then? i would assume it was bleach...

I don't think it's chlorine-based (based on the smell of hair dyes I've used, ammonia's definitely an ingredient, and I think we all know not to mix chlorine and ammonia).

[Pagan]

We've all seen them. On coffee: "Warning. Coffee is hot."

And here's why you see this one! http://www.overlawyered.com/2005/10/...lla_liebe.html

One of my favorites is on the sun shield for your car: Remove before driving! Of course, this being New Mexico, you really can't tell the difference.

[Horsetuna]

I swear on my grandmother's grave, I came home to this! In fact, she growled at me when I tried to move her!

My cat peed in the dryer once. luckily there was laundry in there so it didnt ruin it.

Stil,*glares at cat*

[ArenaBoy]

On the subject of cats getting into things, here's something that as a former cat owner used to see: http://catsinurstuffdoingthings.ytmnd.com/

[Becks]

Next thing you know we'll be putting warning labels on something so safe that I will cry if that happens.

We sold pre-packs of walnuts and the like when I was back in retail, and they had warnings on the front that they contained nuts...

Raps beat me to it.

However, I have seen a label on egg salad that says, "Contains eggs". I wanted to

[Seanette]

My cat peed in the dryer once. luckily there was laundry in there so it didnt ruin it.

Stil,*glares at cat*

Could have been worse. Ever have a cat pee on electric stove burners and not find out until you're using the burner for its normal purpose?

I remember in one Usenet forum, we got into a conversation about the worst smell anyone involved had experienced. I'm still trying to decide which of my two candidates is worse: cooking cat urine or week-dead human body.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

On a bottle of malt vinegar: "Do not drink".

Not on my nametag, but should be: "Your level of service depends on my mood and your attitude"

On a tube of Preparation H: Do not take orally,
Some comedian did a sketch about this and I heard it on the radio. He described the letter from the moron that must've prompted the warning:

Dear Preparation H:

I ate this whole dang tube, and I still have my hemmorhoids! Now my mouth's so small I can't even eat a jellybean anymore!

[Sofar]

On Laptop Computers
Caution: This computer is not intended for use as a pillow or seat cushion.

When Ordering Pizza
Attention: Do not become sexually involved with your partner(s) between the time you place your order and the time the pizza is delivered.

What's interesting is that on this board we have heard stories about people doing both these things, and threatning to sue about it on top of that.

On every package of deoderant there should be a legend that reads: "Not intended to substitute regular bathing."

Oh, and they use hydrogen peroxide to bleach hair, but that doesn't work with especially oily hair, if that's the case than they use benzoyl peroxide, which is the same stuff that they put in automotive bonding compound to help it dry faster.

[MadMike]

On a tube of Preparation H: Do not take orally,
Some comedian did a sketch about this and I heard it on the radio. He described the letter from the moron that must've prompted the warning:

Dear Preparation H:

I ate this whole dang tube, and I still have my hemmorhoids! Now my mouth's so small I can't even eat a jellybean anymore!

I believe that was Bill Engvall, the "Here's your sign" guy.

[friendofjimmyk]

I've done the hydrogen peroxide thing in high school to "bleach" my hair. I've also known of kids during high school that did the bleach thing - not good!

[Lace Neil Singer]

Raps beat me to it.

However, I have seen a label on egg salad that says, "Contains eggs". I wanted to

So did I, the day I looked at a bottle of milkshake and saw the legend "Contains milk." O_o

[phillippbo]

See, I want to start a movement to rid the world of all warning labels. It would weed out the idiots among us by instantly killing off some, while the rest would be so horribly mangled that nobody would want to mate with them, effectively removing their defective DNA from the gene pool. I say we give Natural Selection a chance, dang it!

[Tria]

See, I want to start a movement to rid the world of all warning labels. It would weed out the idiots among us by instantly killing off some, while the rest would be so horribly mangled that nobody would want to mate with them, effectively removing their defective DNA from the gene pool. I say we give Natural Selection a chance, dang it!

Then smart lawyers and idiots would sue for "discrimination".

[phillippbo]

Then smart lawyers and idiots would sue for "discrimination".

Nah. If anyone tries, give them a hairdryer, because we all KNOW they'd use it in the shower. There, problem solved.